Road Gypsies - Val & Holland: 12/28/24

December 22, 2024: Holland has the heater on 24/7/365: my lungs do not do well when heat is high … Holland insists he needs the high heat "so I don't get pneumonia." This has been a bone of contention between us. I need a cool environment to keep my lungs from stressing out. Holland swears he needs to be in a sweat lodge environment to keep his lungs functioning: this does not make sense to me.

He has COPD, and says, "My doctor told me to stay warm so I don't get pneumonia." I agree with that. I do not agree that the house temperature needs to be a sweltering 200-degrees! 70-degrees is a good, balanced, temperature; and if he'd wear slippers on his feet, that would also help. Last night before turning in, he cranked the heat sky high, a.g.a.i.n. - and I again, said, "Seriously? Holland I cannot breathe when the temperature is so high! I don't know what kind of quack {doctor} would tell you that you can get pneumonia in 100-degree weather … but that's not possible. I've had pneumonia - several times. Bob had chronic pneumonia every year. In the winter months, when the weather is crappy. I understand what pneumonia is, and I agree that it hurts like hell and is scary to live through. But. It's impossible to get pneumonia when the temperature is above 80-degrees. You don't need two heaters on, in Arizona!"

We went to our separate rooms: me, in the upstairs bedroom; to try to get some sheen-free/easy breathing sleep under a light sheet (anything more would have been intolerable given hot hot it was) - him, barricaded behind his shut door, with the space heater humming out escalating heat waves as Holland set up his sweat-lodge environment; which includes the electric blanket I bought him last Christmas season.

So, this morning I got out of bed determined to get my laptop up and running … to research the odds of getting pneumonia in sunny, summertime weather.

2 things happened as I sipped my hot coffee and scrolled medical links: I learned that this arid desert environment is not good for either of us given my asthma, and Holland's COPD. I was surprised to learn that - we have both been under the impression that the warm desert environment would be beneficial to our compromised lungs as well as to our aching, aging bodies. I would share this new insight with my husband when he woke up.

There has been a lot of dusty grit in the air here, lately.

We have both been feeling very tired, a good part of each Day.

We have both been coughing.

I have periodic chest pain, headache, and recently … aches and chills; with no apparent reason for any of it.

Holland has been suffering congestion, nose bleeds, and aches.

Lung sickness in Arizona can be caused by a number of conditions, including Valley fever, ozone pollution, and lung cancer:

Valley fever: A lung infection caused by breathing in the spores of the fungus Coccidioides, which is found in the soil in the southwestern United States. Symptoms include fever, cough, chest pain, headache, chills, and fatigue. In severe cases, the infection can spread to other parts of the body. Not everyone with Valley fever needs treatment, but a healthcare provider may prescribe anti-fungal medications.

Itchy skin can also be a symptom of valley fever. The rash can appear as red, raised bumps or nodules that are painful or tender, and can sometimes be itchy. The rash can also appear as a red, raised rash with blisters or pimple-like bumps. The rash is most commonly found on the lower legs, but can also appear on the chest, arms, or back.

Valley Fever Info: https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/valley-fever/symptoms-causes/syc-20378761

Ozone pollution: Ozone pollution can harm healthy people, but is especially dangerous for people with lung diseases like asthma or COPD. Breathing ozone-polluted air can trigger asthma attacks and can even shorten people's lives.

Is hot weather bad for lungs? Breathing in hot, humid air can exacerbate respiratory conditions like asthma and COPD. "The heat increases metabolic demands, which might not be a problem for a conditioned, heat-adapted athlete, but could be deadly for someone with advanced heart or lung disease who is barely getting by."

Nosebleeds are common in Arizona, especially during the winter months, because of the dry climate and indoor heating. They can be caused by a number of things, including:

Dry air: The arid climate in Arizona dries out the mucous membranes in the nose, which can cause them to crack and bleed.

Indoor heating: Using indoor heating during the winter can dry out the air.

Allergies, colds, and sinus infections: These can trigger nosebleeds.

Medications: Blood-thinning medications, like aspirin, Plavix, and Coumadin, can increase the risk of nosebleeds. Holland is on blood thinner medication.

High blood pressure: High blood pressure can increase the risk of nosebleeds. Holland is on high blood pressure medication.

Trauma: An injury to the nose can cause a nosebleed.

Most nosebleeds are harmless and can be treated by pinching your nostrils together for 5–10 minutes. However, you should seek medical attention if you experience frequent nosebleeds, or if the bleeding is a posterior nosebleed. Posterior nosebleeds are rare but serious, and require immediate treatment. They originate high in the nose and flow down the back of the throat. If you're losing a lot of blood, you should call 911 or your local emergency number.

Then my eyebrows rose as I followed several links concerning pneumonia: I learned something new - I learned that it is possible to get pneumonia in 100-degree weather; this is news to me. I would share this new insight with my husband when he woke up.

Yes, it's possible to get pneumonia in the summer, even in 100 degree weather:

Pneumonia can be caused by bacteria, viruses, or fungi. You can get pneumonia by being exposed to germs in places like pools, spas, and crowded indoor areas.

People at higher risk for pneumonia include:

People over 65

Children under 5

People with chronic medical conditions

Smokers

Prevention

You can prevent pneumonia by:

Practicing good hygiene

Not smoking

Getting vaccinated

Washing your hands frequently

Cleaning commonly touched surfaces with rubbing alcohol

Temperature variability: Both high and low temperatures have been linked to increased pneumonia cases. Large temperature changes, like the difference between the daily maximum and minimum temperatures, may affect the respiratory system.

Walking pneumonia: Walking pneumonia is most common in late summer and fall, but it can occur at any time of year.

What are the three major causes of pneumonia?

Bacteria. Bacteria are a common cause of pneumonia in adults. …

Viruses. Viruses that infect your lungs and airways can cause pneumonia.

Fungi. Fungi such as Pneumocystis jirovecii may cause pneumonia, especially for people who have weakened immune systems. PCP is airborne and can spread from person to person.

When my husband wakes up … I have some 'splaining to do ;-)

********************

I drank another cup of Christmas-flavored joy juice, and watched fat and sassy quail race across the pebbled gravel outside my window - while working on another design project:

Quail; Fortuna-AZ

When Holland woke up, and had had his cup of coffee, I shocked him by apologizing about misunderstanding summertime pneumonia. Him: "Wow." Me: "I know how to be humble when I am wrong; I didn't know - now, I do - and now I also know why we've been struggling so much with breathing, tiredness, chills, and that insane itchiness, and blistery rash; I thought it was shingles, but the dustups in Arizona is causing it."

The home mood shifted immediately for the better.

He was surprised about the turn-about-attitude … but he liked it.

Holland said, "I think we should think about moving north - not Washington, because I really want to avoid shoveling snow; maybe somewhere on the Oregon Coast, if we find something affordable. Get out of this dust so we can breathe."

I agreed.

Then, he said, "Let's go on a Road Trip & see all the places you want to see, and may never get to see again - we'll drive to Tombstone & visit Bisbee; find the white sand in New Mexico; jig-jog up to Roswell … and try for the Alamo, since you've never seen any of these places. We'll see as much of what we can before we leave; I'll talk to the landlord when we get back, and let him know we'll be leaving as soon as he gets another renter."

(((Hot dog!)))

Tombstone Daytrip tomorrow :-D

And he added, "Com'on over here so I can hug you." I said, "Are you ready to be my husband?" He said, "I don't want to be a domesticated pet." I said, "I don't even know what that means - but I do know that if you were my pet, you'd be feeling the snap of a rolled newspaper, about now." He laughed, and said, "Com'on; come here." I said, "No." He said, "You're still my wife." I said, "You told me the other day that was over, and "has been over for a long time" - and that you "don't want to be a 'pussified domesticated pet', whatever the hell that means; and you very firmly abdicated your husband position in Quartzsite - you did this based purely on assumptions you got into your head because of flakey Past experiences. I am not Becky. I am not Banji. I am ME … and you aren't interested in getting to know me, you're just interested in making assumptions about me … that lead to fights and separations, because you think I am a "bitchy female" like the flakes you knew in your Past. You want to be "friends" instead of married - okay. But, my male friends don't get to hug and squeeze me - that is husband privilege. So, no, I will not be a friend with benefits - we come from two different generations with two different expectations. You want a {friend} you do not have to "answer to!"; and I want a Husband, instead of a frat brat."

After about half an hour, he closed his laptop and said, "What do you want from me?" I said, "I want a husband. I want you to stop treating me like a mistress - I want you to understand what being a husband is." He said, "I don't treat you like that." I said, "Yes you do. Men tell their mistresses, 'It's none of your business where I go; who I spend my time with; or what I do when I'm not with you' … mistresses are play things, they are not a serious commitment, so the man is right; it's none of her business; he's only interested in hugging and squeezing - he's not interested in including her into his life any further than that. That is how you have been treating me: that is what you have been shouting at me for 23 months straight. I am not a whore: I am your Wife, and I expect to be treated like a Wife. That means I have the right to know where you are going when you leave this house. I have a right to know who you are spending time with while you are gone. I have a right to know what you are doing when you are with those people. Where you go - who you spend time with - the people you surround yourself with & what you do with them reflects on me … and visa versa: that you don't care to include me in any way in your personal life, and you tell me that you don't care where I go, who I spend time, and what I do when I am with my friends tells me that I'm not all that important to you. You should care! Where I go - who I spend time with - the type of friends I have and what I do with them reflects on you, Holland, whether you realize that or not. We are married. That means that we are no longer free agents to behave like we are single, living separate lives. That paper we picked up in Reno made us ONE; that paper gives me the right to have input about where you go, who you go with, and what you do when you are with them: everything you do now is a direct reflection on me - and visa versa. I am not your mistress. I am your Wife. And until you understand what I am talking about, and want to seriously join your life with mine, husband privileges' are on hold. If you just wanted someone to hug and squeeze once in a while … and merrily go about your own way, doing your own thing the other 95% of your time, you shouldn't have married me, Holland. I'm a 100% gal - I want a man who's {all in} in my life. I'm not going to waste my time with someone who refuses to mature." He said, "I'm 62 years old; I am mature." I said, "It's true you are 62 years old, but your outlook on women in general, and your twisted view of marriage is not in any way, mature."

The headphones went back on, and two more hours passed.

I glanced up from what I'd been working on … and saw him shuttling things from the bunk room to the upper bedroom. I asked, "What are you doing?" He said, "You win." I said, "Marriage isn't a competition, Holland; winning is not the objective. Are you ready to be my Husband?" He said, "Yes."

I was surprised about the turn-about-attitude … but I like it.