It doesn't seem like it was 45 years ago …
The ripple effect shook our house in Cathlamet - 102 miles away.
It rocked Puget Island - same distance as Cathlamet.
Durrah's Logging Crew - for which Bob was Shovel Operator - was one of the 1st crews allowed into the Red Zone to do salvage logging.
It was so eerily quiet, and barren; it took me years to get comfortable enough to go there with Bob. The quietness and lunar landscape was freaky. And a little creepy, too.
About 2 years after Bob's physical death, I decided to get out of my comfort zone … and did the Hummocks Trail Hike; it was so beautiful, I did it several more times over the years.
It seems like only yesterday Loowit (Smoking Mountain) blew her top.
My May 18th, 2020 Post~MT. ST. HELEN’S MEMORIES: https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2020/05/mt-st-helens-memories.html
My May 19th, 2021 Post~REMEMBERING MAY 18th, 1980: https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2021/05/remembering-may-18th-1980.html
I have only been back to Mt. St. Helens once, since remarrying: Holland's thing is water … preferably the Pacific Ocean, then rivers.
I'm okay with that.
Mountains are my thing … preferably Mt. Rainier & Mt. Adams; Mt. St. Helens was Bob's mountain - I will always think that way. Getting away into the mountains was an annual thing in my previous Life. But, I have a new Life, now, and things are different.
Different man. Different times. Different experiences. Different Life.
Today is Loowit's (Mt. St. Helens) explosive anniversary; so, I remember those early years when the snow-topped volcano amplified youthfulness. I remember the times spent there with my 1st husband, and our baby daughter. I remember the volcanic temper tantrum that changed the immediate flanking landscape - and the landscape downriver as the raging mudflow tore through Toutle, damaging a portion of I-5 freeway in Castle Rock; changing the course of riverbeds, and lifestyles forever. I remember my husband, then, living away from home (in a camper on a friend's property) for months while he logged the Red Zone, coming home on weekends.
Bob had logged the Mt. St. Helens area in his 1st marriage; and he had logged the Mt. St. Helens 11 years later, 6 years into our marriage.
Different man. Different times. Different experiences. Different Life.
I remember girding myself mentally & spiritually to go back and revisit "Bob's Mountain", 17 mo.'s after his spirit left this planet.
Different woman. Different times. Different experiences. Different Life.
It is okay to remember; it is not okay to dwell on Memory Lane.
1981 Mount St. Helens Movie:
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFN4FPg8GCU)