STRANGER IN A STRANGE LAND; Quartzsite-AZ

Every couple of weeks … Holland derails our relationship.

This usually follows phone convo's between him and Kelso-WA contacts … and those connects always (without fail) follow on the heels of us having a good time together. The devil that rides him can't stand a good time.

He just cannot leave the toxic Past alone - and I end up paying for the nonsense, and feeling the bite of his waspish tongue whiplash.

It's very wearing.

It's draining.

It's frustrating.

I did not break him in his childhood.

I did not abandon him in his teen years.

I am not the wife that betrayed him and turned him sour on women, in general.

I will never be a roll-over Redmill woman.

I refuse to be treated like "less than".

We were supposed to go to Parker Tuesday morning, but bad attitude scrapped that - and last night, he was talking about doing that Friday morning … but the phone calls keep jetting back and forth between here and Kelso; and I'm not going anywhere with a man who acts like all the problems of the world begin and end with women.

Specifically, me; the handiest target.

Because I have a lightening rod temperament, and a no-nonsense attitude, I am not engaging in the current verbal vitriol: I'm pulling back, and sucking into myself. Peace in my life is what I want - peace is what I intend to have.

I dug out my Mezuzah that I was overjoyed to discover a couple weeks ago, was not lost in all the moving to and fro between States.

Holland does not have to agree with my hanging of it - I am a Jew; I am a Messianic Jew … and my home will honor my faith in my God.

A mezuzah serves two functions: (1) every time you enter or leave, the mezuzah reminds you that you have a covenant with God; and (2), the mezuzah serves as a symbol to everyone else that this particular dwelling is constituted as a Jewish household, operating by a special set of rules and beliefs. The Scripture inside the mezuzah is Deuteronomy 6:4-9.

I grabbed a new read to bury myself in, as daylight fades:

New Read; purposefully drawing sunshine into my small corner of the world.

And I purposefully reset my inner balance.

When the tension entered the room, I made it clear to Holland that I was not going to engage in word wars today - which, threw him off balance; and totally ruined his day's purpose.

I'm tired of the mixed messages.

I'm growing weary of the continual battle of the wills.

Holland had been a bachelor for decades before petitioning me to marry him - in previous relationships, he was used to cutting and running when things got a little uncomfortable: he'd been a carefree bachelor of 4 decades.

Hollands conception of marriage is seriously warped - he wants a marriage with a firm grip on bachelorhood mentality: he never cheated on me … and never will, but he's not willing to settle into a solid marital relationship, either. Fully submitting to a marital stage is "emasculating servitude!", according to him.

His view of marriage gives me a headache.

My plea prayer to Elohim for 2025 is a husband with a husband's heart.

Words of love are cheap - without action, they are meaningless.

When 2025 unfolds, I want a man in my life that places me as the center of his universe. I want a man in my life that feels lucky to have me in his life. I want a man in my life who loves me enough to know his heart would break if I died (which is a real possibility).

In short, I want man in my life who is man enough to step over the broken piece of his past life to fully embrace a life that includes me. ALL of me. I want a man mature enough to make room in his life, for a woman like me.

That is not asking "for too much".

The Redmills (men, and women as well) are strange people with strange concepts.

Leon Russell - 'Stranger in a Strange Land' with Lyrics:  (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ejVcr5lS9U)

I am a stranger in a strange land.

I want a husband in my life who is "all in"; a mature man who has both feet on this side of marriage's threshold.

That is what I want; that is what I intend to have.

Life is complicated and the excess baggage is tiring; a clean break from the bad, and a strong shot of good about now … would be nice, Lord.

METALWORK; QUARTZSITE-AZ

We slept in this morning because we were up late last night, into the wee morning hours; watching the 2024 Presidential Election results.

President Trump's landslide win was refreshing - and gratifying.

And, of course, the obamanite crickets were very vociferous: first thing, this morning. I didn't even bother to check family or friend Pages that I knew would be in a foul temper this morning. I wanted to enjoy the winner's victorious peace for a bit while I drank my coffee.

Basking in the warm glow of Patriot accomplishment, we decided to pull ourselves away from the talking heads reports, and go for a short drive.

It was peaceful.

It was fun.

It was just what we needed after being keyed up all week in Electoral anticipation ;-)

Holland started our relaxation drive by taking me a street over, to show me some metal sculptures he found on the internet - and thought I'd enjoy: I did :-)

Then he drove me to a little local Park he thought I'd enjoy exploring walking trails, at: I can probably walk there from our front door in 15 minutes: and I might do just that, when the winds are kicking dust up ;-)

Mere minutes from our front door.

'Freedom Garden Park'; #Plymouth Rd, Quartzsite, AZ

After that, he drove me back over to the Chocolate Mountain mine site - and got me closer to the Stamp Mill than I had gotten earlier this week.

It was a thoughtful thing to do … and he drove a different route; it was a direct route, right to the base of the ghost mill site.

I love being off road.

I love bumping down a dirt road.

I like risky 4 wheeling - not life threatening, but risky in a "are we gonna high center, or plow through"; and "will we get from A to B without getting stuck" kind of risky way. Our Betsy is a beast … and I always praise her when she pulls through for me ;-)

A little 4-wheeling ;-)

Different approach to Sunday's adventure ;-)

SUNDAY OUTING; Old Mines, Old Stone Cabins, & A Strong Wind~Quartszite-AZ: 

(https://roadgypsiesvalandholland.blogspot.com/2024/11/sunday-outing-old-mines-old-stone.html)

I pointed out to Holland, the dirt road junction; where I was almost blown off the mountain trail.

Concrete foundations litter the desert, everywhere.

Different angle of the Chocolate Mountain Gold Mine; Quartzsite-AZ

Holland drove right up to the Chocolate Mountain Stamp Mill; Quartzsite-AZ

We wondered if there were covered mine shafts behind it … looks like a building foundation; could have been a long gone office building.

Where the mineral rocks were stored before being stamped to release the precious prize.

Interesting - but Beast Betsy was just too wide.

This was tricky - but Holland got us through.

I always praise my husband too: because he likes a good challenge, and he's {the man!} in dicey travel circumstances - paved roads, or desert dirt trails.

The winds were high today, and we swallowed a lot of dust; so, when we got back home, I used my Flow Meter, and was happy to see that my lungs had not been stressed out. I learned in Woodland-WA a few months ago, that I am now allergic to my asthma inhaler - so, it's a toss up as to "do I need it?", or "can I ride this lung struggle, through": I've been {riding} for a while, and God willing, I will be riding it through. longer. Aside from being allergic to the darned thing, side affects include cataracts and bone brittling with constant usage - I'd rather my poor body not experience anything else :-(

In the {safe} zone.

After Supper, I glanced out the window and saw that the sky was coloring up very nicely … Arizona night skies are a thing of beauty.

I love sunsets :-)

Evening sky behind Independence; 5:45 PM

Sunset over the Plomosa Mountains; 5:46 PM

Same sunset morphing into "breathtaking"; 5:50 PM

Then, I settled in for a cozy Fall evening: deserts chill down quite a bit when the sun goes down: the low will be 40-degrees tonight.

I pulled a lapghan over my legs, flicked the electric fireplace on, hit the heat-massage tab on my recliner … and found a vintage movie to watch on YouTube, while I work up some baby items to ship off across the ocean. These little knitted "preemie pocket blankets" will give some dignity to the tiny babies who will not survive the neonatal intensive care units - and they will help devastated parents find the mettle they need to get them through this very hard time.

Joy will come in the morning for these parents; and I find joy in knowing that I am, with these little knitted items, helping them get over the dark night hurdle.

Angel Baby Shrouds will be shipped to England.

Heated-massage recliner …

As I head off to bed, I am glad my husband showed me those metal sculptures earlier today. I smile when I think of the mettle he exhibits on our adventures - and the mettle he exhibits to keep us safe and secure, inside and outside our home, in an unsafe world.

I am thankful that Elohim has blessed America, and The People of America, with a strong man of mettle who will do all he can to protect this Great Nation, and the people that are privileged to enjoy American Life.

All is right with my world, tonight ;-)

JOY IS A CHOICE

Tonight, all is alright, in my world.

Cocoa is good on a Fall evening ;-)

And I can lay my head down in peace and security.

His strength (Elohim's strength, Yeshua's strength, President Trump's strength, and my husband's strength) is my joy.