March 22nd: Today we went over to Aunt Gaye's house, to visit a while with her: we loved her very much - and want to spend as much time with her as we can, while we are here in Kingman-AZ
She's not doing well, and wants us to stay here … but Holland says we need to be up North. He says we need to be there, instead of here, "because there's no sand dust up there": there is, but not so bad. And I agree with that stance. However, it's more than that. Lana, Mark, Scott, Tim, Cal, Pete, Sonny, his Dr., and Oak Point - are [up north]; with no changes being made, in regards to any of it.
So.
In a few days we will be pulling stakes here - and moving steadily there. It's debatable exactly "where", at the moment. The Plan was to go directly to Ocean Park-WA, and book space rent through Summer ... then, pack up there, and backtrack to Brookings-OR. But with Cal's recent blowing up his phone's PM app ... I'm thinking probably Woodland. Holland was checking RV Parks in that vacinity last night: even though he knows there are no Park openings to be found there. The next alternative is Castle Rock's RV Park, and that's close to the Kelso chaos.
I am understandably concerned about this move: the concerns are valid.
And after 2 years of continual fighting that centers around his need to haul ass back to WA - I'm just tired of the same arguments. I can let him be wrong.
Before we left the Park today, Holland caught sight of a pickup & RV he recognized: he has been following these RVr's YouTube videos, and now they were here, where he could talk to them personally. So, he did, while I shut off house lights before walking out Independence's door.
I received a text from Jake saying he missed us … so, I snapped off a selfie pic of US - and jetted it off to him via the airwaves: then, we were out of the Park and on our way to Aunt Gaye's:
Holland spotted the truck & RV of Youtuber's he follows; the fella's "famous Uncle" is Tom Hanks. Given the way Hanks has shamefully been behaving, I could care less about him - or their connection to him.
Fat & sassy US; Pic sent to Jake, who misses us & is not on FB; where most people get a glimpse of us.
We had an enjoyable visit with Aunt Gaye, despite her enthusiasm to share her Baha'i religious views with us. Holland was in agreement. I was not - but I stayed silent.
Holland's Aunt Gaye we loved her very much - and want to spend as much time with her as we can, while we are here.
I can love people who do not share my Faith; and sometimes they can love me back (my children do not, and cannot allow themselves to do so).
I can share space, and converse graciously with loved ones … while kindly side-stepping religious landmines.
I can "be like Jesus!" while being like Jesus: He loves people without entertaining their self-destructive behaviors. And, I am understanding that sometimes - like Yeshua - silence is golden.
I am done with rebellious religions, and fickle people who are set in rebellious ways. Holland was surprised I didn't counter argue religious points … but I'm done with that, concerning my husband and his associates. I have learned that to counter argue religious points with Christian truths in Holland's presence … is to invite a week's worth of anger aimed in my direction. I told him in December that I was done with that - and I mean it. Every single branch of Holland's family tree … (and friend circle) … is heavy with some flaky religiosity, or outright atheism. And every single religious point to tear down Christianity always ends with, "There's truth running through every religion - we are all united with religion" & "Who are they (meaning Christians) to tell ME that I'm going to Hell!" I've heard that from my own children for the past 40 years - and I now, am hearing the same thing from Holland when religiosity rears it's ugly head between us. So, because they are not dealing with realities and do not want to truly know what is what: I am staying silent and letting them stay wrong. I no longer cast my pearls before swine. Basically every single one of these people have left the Church and refuse Christianity because they are actively involved in rebellious sin and refuse to grow up and mature; rebellion has become their support animal. It's eating them alive, but they don't care - they'd rather die for their right to fight … than to turn before they burn.
1 John 2:19 strongly implies that those who departed from the community of believers were never truly part of it, and their departure reveals their true nature
I am no longer casting my pearls before swine: “Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces" (Matthew 7:6-7). In Matthew 7:6, the "dogs" represent individuals who are hostile, unappreciative, and potentially dangerous when presented with sacred or precious truths, and the verse advises against wasting valuable spiritual teachings on such people; "swine" metaphorically represents people who are unappreciative of spiritual truths and who will reject or trample on them, rather than valuing them = can also represent those who are hardened and incapable of receiving God's truth, or those who will turn and tear at those who try to share it with them. Yeshua is not saying that people should stop sharing the gospel or sharing spiritual truths, but rather that they should be discerning and not waste their time trying to share valuable things with those who will not appreciate them.
Christianity says in 1 Timothy 2:5, that "There is only ONE God, and ONE Mediator between man/woman and God (Elohim), and that ONE is Christ Jesus (Yeshua Ha'Mashiach)." There is NO "other" by which man/woman can attain everlasting Life. Holland's immediate circle of people seriously depend on every "other" out there: there is no room for Elohim, or for Yeshua. This causes friction between us when the subject is broached … so, now I just hang back and let them be all be wrong. Most of them are caught up in alcohol or drug addictions, some are seriously ill and dying, and some lives are just nearing their end; and regardless of their religious leanings, they are all afraid of dying. They are afraid because they know deep in their hearts that they are living a lie. Holland himself has told me that he "wants to be left behind to fight" (for whatever reason the wacky religion he was raised in, twisted his reasoning).
And so he will be, if he continues on the path he is treading. I would like him to walk with me, in the next life … but my bull-headed Taurus, is stubbornly (and very sadly misinformed religion-wise) resisting.
As for myself, I intend to be air-lifted out of here soon - considering the way things on Earth are unfolding.
And I am d.o.n.e. arguing with people - including my husband - over self-deluding religious points; whose main goal is to attack Christianity: "Two people will be in one bed; one will be taken and the other left" (Luke 17:34-36). John 3:16-18 specifically states that anyone not saved through faith in Christ, will be thrown into the blazing furnace of Hell, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth. There will be no muslim virgins waiting. There will be no catholic prayers for the dead. There will be no Baháʼí (Shiʻa Islam) Báb, Krishna, or Buddha prophecy-prayer-or fast to save them. There will no NAR (new apostolic reformation) concert atmosphere to hype them up. The gig will be up, and they will be lost in eternal hopelessness … and they will have chosen it out of self-serving rebellion because the world is their home; and they - themselves, are their god.
I am not saying, or posting anything I have not personally said to Holland when he starts arguing religion with me. Like his Aunt, he includes all religions & claims to be "saved". I stand on the Scriptures, believe the Gospel Message, and do not agree with his mindset. It's a complication that oftimes has me wondering why Elohim put me in this marriage to Mr. Complication.
All that said, it really was an enjoyable visit with Aunt Gaye. And she sent me home with some costume jewelry she doesn't use anymore - I was appreciative of the colorful pieces; and will be leaving Kingman-AZ with meaningful mementoes.
Wearing the gifted costume jewelry and listening to Holland's determined arguments about the need to live in the PNW; I am thinking that he is conveniently forgetting how sick & outright miserable, we get up there.
Given the "up north" madhouse activities, seasonal allergies, and chilling wetness that greatly limits my mobility 6 months out of every year; due to aching joints - I'd choose the AZ dust ups & PNW distancing. But, I have no choice. It has all been decided. My only saving grace is knowing that Elohim is looking out for my best interests, and HE will provide what I need, when I need it, wherever Holland parks Independence.
As you rightly think, reading this post - I am not happy about going back up north.
Holland's breathing will not get better: he is suffering with COPD, and the nicotine chews he is eating like tic tacks, is only exasperating the condition. He refuses to acknowledge that he did not hack and spit until he started with the nicotine chews. He always coughed, but it was not as severe.
I can let him be wrong.
I have always coughed - Bob understood, but the kids were always {disgusted!} and annoyed with the constant coughing - they failed to understand that I was not contagious, I was trying to stay alive by coughing the mucus out of my struggling, inflamed, lungs; especially in the winter months when bronchitis added it's burdensome infliction to my already asthma weary lungs. The heavy humidity that hangs over WA State like a shrouding soaking wet blanket … and the Spring allergens, are serious concerns for me. Dry climates are much better for my struggling body. Holland, is overlooking the seriousness of this move.
And I am trying not to be overly angry.
I cannot breathe, or move easily up north …
He cannot breathe, or move easily down south.
And there doesn't seem to be a neutral State between here and there that he will consider. He is set his sights on Brookings-OR; but I'm not convinced it will be much better that the WA coastline. I mean: it still "occasionally" snows there! Meaning the temperatures will be relatively close to WA's coastal winter weather. I could barely move when we were in Ocean Park-WA last Fall, without joint pain.
I'm working on a new crochet lapghan - I'm going to need it, up there.
New lapghan unfolding; Bleu tore the other one up, with his toenails.
And I know that Elohim goes before me, and will "make straight the way before me" - wherever Holland decides to park Independence.
I am not happy about this move northward. But I'm going to look for the silver lining, trust Elohim, and pray to God that the demonrat nonsense stops: I really, really want some peace in my future.
Maybe a miracle will happen, and this will be my last moving rant …
Working on a crochet item & listening to a newsfeed …
Hate-spurred Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS), continues …
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