TILLAMOOK-OR (Pt. 1)

August 28th: I have Ashkenazi, Sephardic, Hungarian, & American Indian DNA coursing through my veins … being "on the move" is part of who I am. I have itchy feet that need to feel the rhythm of motion from one place to another; so, I'm glad to be on the move again 😁

We'll probably crash as soon as we secure a spot for Independence.

Tillamook-OR from Ocean Park-WA; 2 hr 6 min (91.1 mi) via US-101 S

Hanging coastal fog gave off an ethereal feeling as we passed through Chinook, this morning.

We were both glad to be leaving the PNW gloominess behind; it's been like this since we arrived here, in April 😟

As we were nearing the Astoria-Megler Bridge, flocks of brown pelicans flanked us as they winged their way up the Columbia River … and as we passed through Astoria to Warrenton, we saw huge flocks of white pelicans perched atop the old pylons lining the Bay's shoreline. I like seeing pelicans; so, I will miss this part of our ventures in the PNW.

Crossing from WA to OR, where we'll follow the coastline to our 1st layover in Tillamook-OR

Hwy 101 & Youngs Bay Bridge, which connects Astoria-OR to the Oregon Coastline.

First stop was Les Schwab in Warrenton-OR to have a tire switched out - I stayed in Betsy and slept through the whole thing.

Then, on the road again & fueled by a coke & Cheeto's (Holland sipped a Red Bull), I did stay awake the rest of the drive; but I knew Holland must have been feeling the Sandman's breath on the back of his neck. We agreed that once we set pegs, sleep would dominate the rest of the Day👌: there would be plenty time to engage in adventurous explorations over the weekend.

The Day was gray & foggy, all day long, but it progressed peacefully and amicably 🕊️

Twins Ranch Rail Bike Tours; Wheeler-OR: 

(https://tillamookcoast.com/what-to-do/railriding-oregon-coast/)

We heard before we saw the big black Steam Engine on the tracks in Garibaldi-OR. It was pretty cool to see the puffs of white steam billowing around the bulky black engine - kinda like a time-warp moment 😉

McCloud Railroad #25 is a historic 2-6-2 "Prairie" type steam locomotive built by ALCO in 1925, which spent 30 years hauling logging trains for the McCloud River Railroad before being preserved and entering excursion service. After appearing in films like Stand By Me and Bound for Glory, the locomotive was purchased in 2011 by the Oregon Coast Scenic Railroad and moved to Garibaldi, Oregon. It now operates public excursions on the Oregon Coast Scenic Railroad.

Further along, we saw a gigantic coal burner smokestack in Garibaldi … and a concrete bridge in Tillamook - both pretty impressive, and ground-breaking in their landmark eras:

Mc C.R.R.R. #25 Steam Engine; Garibaldi-Oregon: (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/McCloud_Railway_25#:~:text=The%20locomotive%20is%20stored%20in,in%20service%20as%20of%202024.)

Oregon Coast Scenic Railroad Car - part of the McCloud Railroad #25 Steam Engine Tour; Garibaldi-OR

It's a mystery … I can't dig up any internet info; Garibaldi-OR

The 'Three Graces' rocky protrusions in Garibaldi-OR:  (https://jbrish.com/adventures-oregon-garibaldis-graces-pier/ & https://www.beachconnection.net/news/old-familiar-landmark-falls-off-garibaldi-three-graces.php)

The tall, old, smokestack that still stands in Garibaldi-OR, was built by a man named Hammond in the 1927. The smokestack was part of the Hammond Lumber Company. People from the time period described him as an exceptionally caring and generous man.

1927 Hammond Smokestack, seen from across the river as we continued forward to Tillamook-OR

The Garibaldi Smokestack

The great smokestack still towers above the small coastal fishing town and port of Garibaldi located on the Oregon Coast.

In 1918, developer Cummings-Moberly built a sawmill on this site. The Whitney Mill Chimney, the remaining smokestack, was constructed by the Hammond Company, the third owners of the mill.

Thanks to construction of the Pacific Railway and Navigation Railroad, they had a distinct advantage over the other mill in Garibaldi, the Smith Mill, which relied on coastal schooners to transport its lumber. That said, in 1920, Cummings-Moberly went broke and was taken over by the Whitney Company which operated until 1924 when it too was sold to A.B. Hammond.

Under Hammond, the mill became one of the largest on the West Coast. In slow market times, Mr. Hammond built houses for the workers to keep them busy. By the late 1920’s Garibaldi was known as a “company town” providing homes for mill personnel, a boarding house at the Whitney Inn, and some of the best baseball teams on the west coast.

Hammond built the smokestack in 1927-28 to keep from suffocating the town’s growing population as there was a large electric generating plant fired by wood waste located here.

In 2013, the Garibaldi city council debated whether or not to tear down the iconic landmark due to extreme deterioration. It had become a safety hazard, caused by the wind and salt air coming off the Pacific. 

Thanks to John Foulk, who suggested fiber glassing the structure to help prevent any further disintegration, the old smokestack still remains to this day. 

The Concrete Wilson River Bridge.

The Wilson River Bridge; Tillamook-OR:  (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wilson_River_Bridge)

Tillamook-OR: 

(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tillamook,_Oregon)

Air Museum; Tillamook-OR: 

(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tillamook_Air_Museum)

We arrived at our destination 🎯, secured a nice country-setting-space in Tillamook-OR through Saturday, & set up; chatted a few minutes with a friendly, curious, neighbor; I got a workout wrestling the picnic table about 15 feet out of the way (it had been blocking both doors, so I dragged it up towards the main road - cardio & full body workout was engaged 💪😉👊; while Holland finished getting Independence set to right) - & as soon as the slide-outs were slid out & set in place … we both promptly fell into 🛌 for a much needed 6 hour sleep 😴

Our layover, for the next 2 Days … Pleasant Valley RV Park: #11880 U.S. 101 S, Tillamook, OR

This RV Park a nice place to layover - but there is a glitch: WIFI is very sketchy here - like the dial up, landline era. It could be that the trees , or the ever-present coastal fog, is hampering the airwaves - but whatever the reason for the snail pace internet crawl, Holland is not happy with our high-priced [signal anywhere, everywhere] T-Mobile Tower 😡; he's been threatening that tower with replacement of Elon Musk's Starlink, and this may be the final straw. The connect with T-Mobile is very slow, with many sudden cut off's.

Other than that, this is a nice place to layover 👍

DEALING WITH A NARCISSIST~Self-Care 2025; Ocean Park-WA

August 27th: Tomorrow morning around 5 AM, we'll be pulling out of here …

Betsy & Independence; Ocean Park-WA

Honestly - I do not know why we are even driving all those thousands of miles to CA just to continue the same tired cycle - he can treat me like crap here; and it would be easier on his joints and our bank account.

For myself, I'm going to honor the pledge I made before Almighty God - it won't be easy, but I'd rather struggle with this marriage that isn't; than struggle against Elohim, even if living with a narcissist is a continual uphill climb. There is never any true ground gained … it's all a slippery slope, and the footing is always tricky.

Emotional gaslighting destroys trust. Stalled trust ends a relationship.

But, I've gone through worse trials & Yeshua was always there when I needed His strength. People let me down, but God never does. I can always trust Elohim's Plan for my Life. I may not understand the why's - but I always trust the One, Who sits on the throne.

I am not ignorant of what a narcissist is: my mother and sister were married to cruel males who treated them very shabbily. I pointedly go out of my way to avoid toxic men. I am literally shocked that I now find myself married to a narcissist - I never saw that coming down the pike.

Holland doesn't fit the stereotype. It was only after we'd been married about 2 weeks that I realized the deep waters I was in. The sneaker waves come in cycles; never seen, but always lurking to eventually strike with a vengeance.

I'm learning the cycles, though. The code words which mean the waves are gathering strength. The love bombing that always leaves emotional pain and soul anguish in it's wake. The sneaky behaviors and ridiculous lies in attempts to cover up the sneakiness - always over some stupid bullshit that wouldn't have mattered if I'd been in the loop, anyway. The angry verbal dart hurled my way because he's blame-shifting to avoid feeling the guilt nagging at his heart to feel. Something. Anything. 

Sorry and true remorse would be a novel experience.

I'm realizing that it's not whether I know, or whether I don't know … he gets a wild hair and it's all about rebellion at that point. He does what he wants regardless of the impact on me, or the relationship.

I'm distancing myself from the chaos, and taking care of myself.

Physically. Emotionally, Spiritually.

She didn't stop loving him - she stopped losing herself to love him.

I may be his target - but I am not an easy target. He may think to make me a victim; but I refuse to be a victim. He may engage in mean-spirited cat and mouse games, but I'm familiar with cat and mouse games.

I've never been a victim.

Eventually even Elohim will tire of his egocentric silliness and slap him down. I will not enjoy watching that; but I am fervently anticipating it. It is needed. Anytime soon would be greatly appreciated.

So … I just stop going to places he wants to visit: like relatives. Where the behavior is practiced by everyone.

The males are overbearing.

The females are docile - except the ones who have been with the family forever and are given the green light to "misbehave.'

WTH

I won't be controlled. By anyone. For any reason.

When MY male misbehaves and tries to control me in public situations, I …. (1) simmer on a low burn and explode in the vehicle on the way back home to the battlefield (2) give him a chance to settle down and behave in public; if he continues the dysfunctional behavior, my low simmer eventually hits the danger zone & I will firmly correct the words he is twisting. I will risk the verbal berating - or freeze out, later on (3) just get up & walk out. I'm [out], & He can deal with the freeze out.

I have NEVER accepted this behavior. From my mother. From my children.

I am too old for this immature bullshit.

I am NOT going to be controlled by a dominating males high on self-importance and toxic ego.

So, I just stopped sitting at unwelcome dysfunctional relatives' tables.

And because it keeps happening; and has gotten worse following Scott's death … I won't be taking this fallout-Kelso-mess to his relatives' tables in CA. He can go visit alone, and tell them whatever he wants to tell them about my absence. Actually, he can keep my name off his lips.

I will build and set MY OWN Table. Where I am welcome. Where I won't be disrespected. Where peace reigns.

I.WILL.NOT.BE.CONTROLLED

To find balance in this seriously unbalanced relationship (if it can be termed such), I need to pull back & focus on my own well-being and stand firm with my boundaries. My emotional safety, and my soul healing, are top priorities: living with a a narcissist is very draining. With all levels of being.

I've been busy all day dodging fiery darts, and getting Independence ready to roll; but I did find some time to make time for some cardio exercises - light cardio, but that's okay. Cardio is cardio:

The Step Back-Torso Twist exercise helps improve balance and overall lower body stability - and it's knee-friendly, making it a good option for those with knee issues.

This exercise also uses your obliques (internal and external), which are responsible for rotation, along with the rectus abdominis and transverse abdominis for general core stabilization. The erector spinae and quadratus lumborum in your lower back also engage to support the movement. This exercise also engages leg muscles like the hip flexors; & stabilizing muscles throughout the body may also be activated.

1 Minute Step Back-Torso Twist Workout : 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iu8d6HrLfoU)

The Step Half Jacks is a low impact, full-body exercise, that engages a range of muscles, primarily in the legs and glutes (quadriceps, calves, glutes) and the core (abdominals and lower back), with the shoulders and arms also participating in the movement. This exercise is good for balance, stability, and cardiovascular health.

The muscles of the lower back include the erector spinae group (iliocostalis, longissimus, and spinalis), multifidus, and quadratus lumborum. These muscles work together to support the expand, rotate, & stabilize the spine - to maintain posture, and to enable activities such as bending, lifting, and walking. 

 

I hope to be doing some walking, Friday sometime, in CA

FEEDING MY SOUL/Self-Care~2025; Ocean Park-WA

SO good to listen to.

Pioneers of Messianic Worship (2025) | Full Official Documentary: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBQecYkvUy4)

SO much fun to see people I've met and known in my early Messianic Christian Walk - we've all gotten much older as the years passed 😂🤣

The Jesus People movement was fading when I became aware of the Messianic Jews for Jesus movement.

Over time, Bob joined me in the Messianic Walk, & I we met, fellowshipped, and sung with Stuart Dobermann, and Joel Chernoff.

From 1979 I was introduced by friends to the 'Jews for Jesus' movement, and the Messianic Band 'Lamb': I was immediately hooked (I had been praying for music I could relate to). I have listened to, & bought every song Lamb (Joel's band) ever out out: Bob & I met him in person in 2013; when he was a guest speaker/singer at the fellowship we were attending in Vancouver-WA. We met & fellowshipped with Stuart at a home fellowship in Lexington-WA, in 1987; at the time, he was a fledgling songwriter from Nebraska. I was also introduced to the 'Purple Pomegranate' Jewish Folk music, of Haight-Ashbury-CA (no longer operating), which I enjoyed. Stuart's music is sung in many Christian churches - and I spotted his songs in the hymnal at the Oak Point meets - I was glad to see that his songs had finally been put into a collection.

Paul Wilbur, a singer then with the Messianic Band, 'Israel's Hope' was an instrumental singer Bob listened to during his 1981 healing, following his death & resurrection (there are witnesses to this fact, as well as medical documentation on record). Paul's early messianic songs were too frantic for me … but, Bob loved the frenzy.

I had been listening to Marty Goetz's songs every Saturday on televised 'The Jewish Voice' program. Bob started watching with me after he got saved in 1981. And our biker friend Dave Hargrove started joining us in our livingroom, every Saturday: he eventually got saved & left this Earth in 2014, and I will see him again when my ticket to paradise is stamped 😊

Since 1988, Bob & I attended Messianic Fellowships in Portland-OR & Vancouver-OR, pretty exclusively. When Bob was called home beyond the clouds, the winter of 2018, it took me a while to drive myself to the Vancouver fellowship again & I went every Saturday morning until I remarried.

Holland gets nervous around anything Jewish - including me: this is part of the redmill religion paranoia.

BUT, my messianic lifestyle is being brought back into the home environment. For 30 months it has been stopped because Holland would get so furious; he was so fearful of anything Jewish, and accusing me of practicing seventh day aventism, and literally calling me a devil worshipper (his actual words a few minutes ago 😔). Now, I'm just tired of being silenced, & I'm really tired of trying to explain something he does not want to hear - he is determined to believe what he believes; he has been indoctrinated by the redmill religion based on cultic tyranny, and fear to hold him from breaking lose.

Personally, I intend to have peace reigning in the home; I have tried to meet my new husband halfway … but he is only interested in digging his heels in to force the devilish redmill religion. I am no longer going to be bullied, or shut down.

Messianic songs, again, will fill the interior environment.

And Shabbat meals with challah will grace weekend table, again.

I am going to be myself, again … and he can join me, or not: the choice is his. But there will be no more fighting with him on this issue. The Home Atmosphere is my decision (Holland has been very clear on male-female roles; I am going to hold him to his role preferences), and I intend to have peace reigning in the home. Our time spent in CA through the next few months should be interesting …

I'm glad I found this documentary; Elohim always provides 😁👌

AZ HABOOB~2025; Ocean Park-WA

AZ Haboob Dust Cloud; Aug.26, 2025

WOW! 😳

We have daytripped, & set pegs, in all of these areas during our Road Gypsy travels: and Holland has visited his mother's relatives, and lived-worked construction jobs, in all of the areas during his lifetime. He lived in Phoenix for 2 years during his 1st marriage.

We been on all of these roads many times grocery shopping, sight-seeing daytrips, passing through to visit relatives … & I've never seen any of this in my time spent in AZ - but, Holland has:

Biggest Dust Storm In Years Slams The Valley: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UIBGMwSwg0 & https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2H-YFskHK0)

I am GLAD 🙏 we are not in AZ now: and I'm pretty sure we'll never be going back, due to the sandstorms we experienced in Yuma & Quartzsite. Yuma was the worst, when the winds picked up. They are called "devil winds" for a reason.

I have never seen a "haboob" - but Holland has, when he lived and worked in, the Phoenix area. He did righteous by taking me to see AZ every 6 months for the past 2 years … but, I agree that we can't go back.

If we had been in Phoenix when this dust cloud blew through, we may well be dead right now: the dust is literally driven through any opening; even small openings that seem very tight in vehicles. Our lungs would not have survived the assault.

Towering Wall Of Dust Leaves Thousands Without Power In Metro Phoenix: (https://www.msn.com/en-us/weather/topstories/towering-wall-of-dust-leaves-thousands-without-power-in-metro-phoenix/ar-AA1LdKEj?ocid=winp1taskbar&cvid=302afc0954b844d58c4e4aa84ea28aad&ei=6)

THE SUM OF SMALL EFFORTS; Ocean Park-WA

3 days left before we hook up, and pull outta here.

We'll be glad to leave the chill & fog behind. It's been a real bummer at the beach, this year 😕

Betsy & Independence; very foggy here, today; Ocean Park-WA

Another dense fog warning - it's been like this most of our time here, this year; we'll be glad to leave this behind.

We both spent the day intermediately between tasks and down time with online scrolling's: Holland worked more of Betsy projects, and social media … and between relaxing movies, I was securing stuff so it wouldn't bounce off the walls when Independence is trucking down the highway - I drafted Holland at one point, to help me store the lawn chairs in the upper bunk 😘

By Day's end, we had really accomplished quite a bit, even with out small-efforts-lazy way of going about it.

And, I even found time to get a short workout, in - nothing intense; but every little bit helps; a couple months from now, I will appreciate today's sum of small efforts 😉

Full Body Workout Muscles.

The Step Half Jacks is a low impact, full-body exercise, that engages a range of muscles, primarily in the legs and glutes (quadriceps, calves, glutes) and the core (abdominals and lower back), with the shoulders and arms also participating in the movement. This exercise is good for balance, stability, and cardiovascular health.

The muscles of the lower back include the erector spinae group (iliocostalis, longissimus, and spinalis), multifidus, and quadratus lumborum. These muscles work together to support the expand, rotate, & stabilize the spine - to maintain posture, and to enable activities such as bending, lifting, and walking. 

Glutes, quads, & calves muscles.

Shoulder & Upper Back muscles.

Lower Back muscles.

The Step Back exercise helps improve balance and overall lower body stability - and it's knee-friendly, making it a good option for those with knee issues.

Supper was a steamed meal of veggies and pork steak - it actually turned out pretty good. While we ate, we talked about things we hope the weather will allow us to enjoy on our way to Coalinga-CA … as well as some things we hope to enjoy once we get there.

We're both looking forward to new adventures 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 

Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros - 'Home' song: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHEOF_rcND8)

SHAVUA TOV~Self-Care 2025; Ocean Park-WA

"Shavua Tov" (שָׁבוּעַ טוֹב) is a Hebrew phrase meaning "good week".

We're leaving here on the 28th.

Holland worked on the door latch this afternoon - taking one out, and replacing it with another. Eventually he wants to get a digital one, but for now, this is what happened today:

Betsy & Independence; Ocean Park-WA

Holland wrapping tasks up.

Very strong winds - not gale force, but pretty strong.

The wind is high here in Ocean Park-WA today, so I engaged in some indoor stretching exercises for a bit. There are many workout movements that don’t involve machinery - as a Messianic Christian Jew, I am not bound by the endless orthodox rules and regulations enforced in many Jewish homes and communities … but I do join in solidarity & respect for the Shabbat Rest, with my Jewish brethren spread across Earth's surface; so I try to do things during my Shabbat Rest period that honors both my Jewish & my Christian heritages.

I like working my body - to strengthen it, and to keep it flexible. As much as possible, I want to be able to use my body for the purposes and with flexible abilities, it was designed and crafted for.

The Reverse Lunge exercise primarily works the quadriceps and glutes, with significant contributions from the hamstrings, which are responsible for hip extension and stability. The exercise also engages the core muscles (abdominals and back) for stability, and the calves and inner thigh muscles (adductors) act as secondary stabilizers and supporters for the movement.

Reverse lunges are beneficial for building lower body strength, improving balance and stability, and enhancing functional movement.

The Step Jacks exercise engages a full-body workout, targeting the quadriceps, hamstrings, glutes, adductors, abductors, and calves in the legs, along with the shoulders, lats, traps, and core for stabilization and upper body involvement. This low-impact exercise is a versatile cardiovascular and full-body strength move that benefits the entire body.

Adductor Muscles: (https://www.brisbanephysiotherapy.com/news/adductor-muscles-strain-injury)

Step Jacks work the heart and lungs to build fitness without too much impact on the joints. They improve balance and spatial awareness (spatial awareness is, very simply, an visual & mental awareness of the objects in the space around us, and also an awareness of our body's position in that space), help develop muscular endurance in the legs, arms, and shoulders

The lats are the latissimus dorsi muscles, a large, flat, triangular muscle located on the back, below the shoulder blades and extending to the spine. They are involved in shoulder and arm movement, as well as stabilization of the back.

The trapezius muscle, commonly known as "traps," is a large, triangular muscle in the upper back that plays a crucial role in scapular and neck movement, as well as posture. It's divided into upper, middle, and lower fibers, each with distinct functions that contribute to a wide range of movements

The Standing Knee-to-Elbow exercise primarily works the abdominals and obliques due to the twisting, contracting motion of the core. You also engage the hip flexors to lift your knee and the glutes and quadriceps to stabilize your standing leg and maintain balance. The shoulders and arms are also lightly engaged to help guide the movement.

As you lift your knee, the hip flexors activate. Simultaneously, you twist your torso, contracting the obliques to bring your opposite elbow to your knee. The abdominals work throughout the exercise to stabilize your core and facilitate the crunching motion. Meanwhile, the standing leg's muscles (quads and glutes) are engaged to keep you upright.

Mid-day, I’m ready for a Shabbat naps - even if I can’t actually sleep, I'll embrace that luxury of staring into space for a while, with nothing scheduled and no consequences. I may, or may not, pick up where I left off in my current Clive Cussler novel. Reading is encouraged during Shabbat observance; it doesn't always involve spiritual themed material.

And we'll eat light, tonight. Holland will finish off last night's chili mac & cinnamon cornbread leftover's; and I'll have a ramen noodle bowl. While the orthodox community does not cook or bake on Shabbat … it is permissible to reheat food prepared or bought before Shabbat, according to personal halakhic (hall-soft a-kick) practice = Jewish law and tradition that governs the religious and daily life of Jewish people.

Tomorrow, I get busy with my tasks ✅ of getting Independence ready to roll come Thursday 👍

Susanna - 'The Lord Bless You And Keep You Aaronic Blessing': (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mc-WaFYk3U)