CHAPTER 2~National Marriage Week #2-2026~Self-Care; Coalinga-CA

National Marriage Week 2026 will be observed from February 7 to 14. The theme for this year is "Man and Woman He Created Them: Together With Purpose."

Holland & I met and became fast friends the Fall of 2021 - coffee dates happened in November of 2022 & by Christmas, we were a couple planning a solidified future.

Air Supply - 'Even The Nights Are Better' Lyrics: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCnGC5bDhDw&list=RDZCnGC5bDhDw&start_radio=1

We were blissfully happy and never anticipated the storm that was brewing. We had met at a Fellowship gathering ⛪️ We both had been celibate for lengthy periods of time. We both came from Christian backgrounds & agreed we would have a Christian Marriage ✝️ We didn't expect perfect; we are wiser than that … but, we were riding high with hopes of a bright and happy life unfolding.

We both quickly found out 🤔 that a Christian Marriage does not mean clear or easy sailing: the discord sprung up very quickly when it became obvious to both of us that both of us have very different outlooks on Life in general - but our differences 😳 primarily revolved around Faith foundations, moral understandings, and Scriptural dictates on Christian behaviors.

Holland's Christian understand is loosey-goosey. Holland was raised a [preacher's kid] in a religious family network that closely resembles the 1960's counterculture  such as 'The Children of God' & 'Jim Jones' Faith Temple' movements that originated in CA & swiftly spread among the freewheeling free spirits populating the PNW (CA-OR-WA); his parents were aspiring evangelists grabbing at the brass ring of spectacular notoriety akin to the likes of John Hagee & John Osteen - where Holland tells  me, his father preached in both churches before they became mega ministries. At some point both parents became disillusioned, divorced, and eventually left the faith altogether. His siblings were snared by worldly pursuits that ended badly for all of them. Holland though, for all his loosey-goosey stubbornness, is actively seeking for a firmer foothold faith-wise and is trying to figure things out for a satisfactory conclusion. His stubborn machismo has settled down, and he's more open to a more discipline pathway forward. This is welcome progress.

My Christian understanding is firmer; more disciplined. I was not raised in a religious home: my childhood homelife seemed more like Hell than a safe haven - when I became a Christian in 1968, I did it alone and with the knowledge that I would be a hinderance and a liability to my parents and siblings … and that was okay with me because I wanted nothing more to do with the Hell that was being played out 24-7-365 under my parent's roof; Yeshua was my saving grace & is my Life anchor. Though I did live in my mother's house until I married Bob in 1974 & moved down the street to his house, I lived my life separate from my parents and siblings: that separateness is still activated today. Bob became a Christian in September of 1981, and passed into Glory in December of 2018. We had raised our children in the teaching of Christian homelife … but children are not robots and they eventually grow away from parents to forge lives of their own making: our children do not live a Christian life, nor have they raised their children with a Christian leaning - they live their lives separate from me. I did not enter the dating fray following my husband's physical death, as most widows do; I am a Christian and was widowed at age 62. Romance wasn't on my radar, and booty calls wasn't a thought entertained, I figured on living out my remaining years a solo lobo. But that wasn't Elohim's Plan, & Holland had been waiting a long time for me to show up in his life. When Elohim set His Plan in motion, I was skeptical. When Holland made his romantic move 🥰, I was surprised. When Yeshua opened my eyes 💘💝 to the love being so unexpectedly being offered me, I slowly became welcoming.

I entered a new marriage with caution. I know I am a lot for most people - I draw a very clear line in the sand; I have hard and fast boundaries. And I did warn Holland, saying upfront, "I will make you mad 😤😡, and I will do it often, without meaning to. I come with deep scars - Bob had to wade through a lot of past trauma, and carefully tread triggers. I am a lot 🤔😳 for most people; I keep my circle small and my tribe is a mixed bag that come with their own hurdles to clear. Are you sure you really want a piece of this?" He assured me, saying, "I waited a long time for you. I love you - I loved you then, I love you now. I want you." We married and have been tested sorely ever since.

But there have been celebrated victories too 👊👏, along the rocky route. Holland beat a Vicodin addiction ☝️ We both learned how to combat and overcome eroding triggers that sprung up over miscommunications that led to misunderstanding. We learned how to weather sketchy relationship tempests.

The term "covenant marriage" refers to the understanding of marriage as a divine institution, that transcends mere companionship, or romantic fulfillment. Happiness is what forges love and ultimately brings you together … but the overall goal & the primary purpose of marriage, is to foster spiritual growth and character development in both partners. Marriage is a powerful trajectory for personal transformation and a deeper relationship with Elohim.

Holiness Over Happiness: while happiness is a blessing, the ultimate goal of marriage is to cultivate holiness. This perspective encourages couples to view their relationship as a means to grow closer to Elohim - and reflect His character in their lives ☝️ ✝️  

Of course happiness is a key component to marriage - people marry the person they find happiness with. But happiness is an inside job … the deep waters of marriage ofttimes creates turbulent waves where happiness begins to dissipate; and relational worry sets in, self-centered feelings overshadow, and undisciplined behavior cascades. This is when danger signs appear & concerning whirlpools occur.

Your thoughts, your actions, your beliefs are all heavily scrutinized: your entire being is laid bare & examined thoroughly; flaws are discovered, inconsistencies are highlighted, inquiring queries begin to sound like character assassinations, outright disagreements that lead to fiery arguments feel like open warfare, & silent withdrawals will lead to loneliness which will feel like abandonment.

Tom Petty - "Love Is A Long Road' song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOpuB5aSVF4&list=RDqOpuB5aSVF4&start_radio=1

This is when remembering that you have entered into a sacred covenant is vitally important.

Keeping your eyes focused on Elohim's Sacred Plan for your marriage, keeping your thoughts open to the Ruach HaKo'desh's guidance, and keeping your hearts open to the healing power of Yeshua's love is what will carry you safely and securely through the storms of life that threaten to capsize your marriage.

Elohim is on call 24/7/365 🙏: He listens without interrupting comment.

The Ruach HaKo'desh is always present 🕊️ - He comforts without unrelated comparisons.

Yeshua is a constant Companion; He walks beside us with an open empathetic ear, a loving compassionate heart, strengthens the wounded heart with wise counsel 👑 … & doesn’t interject the struggles He went through; when Yeshua says, ‘I am with you in this, you are not alone”, He means it.

Selah - 'You Are My Hiding Place' song: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iukRJ9Wnr6A)

{{The LORD your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love; He will rejoice over you with singing." (Zephaniah 3:17)}}

I AM SO GLAD! 

Thank You Yeshua, El Gibbor (Mighty One).

On another note …

Today, I did some aerobic body toning: although this workout is not actually considered an aerobic workout - according to workout coach Robbins; it will still improve your cardiovascular health if it gets you breathing heavily. The Darebee Sparrow Workout is designed to be a cardiovascular system workout, which can help improve aerobic endurance and cardiovascular fitness. For a 69-year-old woman, it is recommended to consult with a healthcare provider to ensure that the workout is appropriate for her specific health status and fitness level. The provider can provide personalized advice and guidance to help her safely and effectively engage in the workout. It is also advisable to listen to her body and take rest days as needed. The workout can be beneficial for building strength, losing weight, and improving fitness.

I don't do jumping exercises: with asthma, I do not have the lung capacity for that - and even if I did, at my age, jumping would be unwise. So, I improvise when necessary. I have included motion examples & alternative movements following the Darebee Worksheet printout …

Muscles used.

Kicks~20 reps x2; Side Jacks~12-20 reps x2; Step Jacks~10 to 20 reps x2; Side Bends~10-12 reps on EA side, x2; Knee-to-Elbow~8-10 reps x2; Deadlift Walk~5-10 reps x2

Low-Impact Butt Kicks

Side Step Jacks

Step Side Jacks

Overhead Arm-Reach Stretch

Elbow-to-Knee Twists

Staggered Deadlifts

We enjoyed the sunshine warmth … and took time adjusting to the news of his beloved Uncle George's death on Friday - that Holland learned last night via a Facebook announcement.

Holland & his Uncle George Meyers; Hanford-CA

He should have received a phone call from his cousin Brad, who is up here from Texas and was taking care of his father following Brenda's death in December (Brenda is Brad's sister, and was caring for her father daily the past 2-1/2 years). Holland was hurt that no one called him, but he figures they are mad at him because he didn't go to Brenda's Celebration of Life, a few weeks ago. That's on them, and to my way of thinking, their behavior is inexcusable since they all know that Holland would have been in too much pain to make the long drive from here to Kingsburg. He would have gone if he could have stood the pain of a 2-1/2 hour drive & a couple hours' long schmoozing session: he simply could not have done it - even with me as a spot driver, it would have been too much pain burn to risk.

Kingsburg-CA from Coalinga-CA; 1 hr. 10 mins via CA-33, W Mount Whitney Ave

Their behavior is inexcusable because they all know (and have seen) how much pain he suffers with extended drives & visits. Since February of 2024, we have laid over at some point here in CA every 6 months, specifically to visit with Brenda & Uncle George - we made it a special point of actually visiting CA to spend our time and $$$$ here - when Holland would really avoid this state altogether except that those 2 lived here. Brenda knew that fact. Uncle George understood that fact. Brad knows that fact. Bruce knows that fact. Their bad behavior is inexcusable, from my point of view.

So, this month will be the last time we spend time in CA ... at least in this neck of the CA woods. Holland has a strong dislike for CA in general - and now, like he said, "there's really no reason left to come back here."

But, I too, found out about my youngest brother's death last summer, through a FB Feed: no private message … just an announcement posting between my sister & her FB pals. I called my niece to let her know - and she already knew; and never bothered to pass the news on to me. You find out real quick in times like this that you are not as close to people as you think you are. She was really the only active link I had to my siblings; and now that has come to a close.

Bad behavior - from anyone - is inexcusable.

Time shore each other up, soothe love balm on the trigger points;  readjust, refocus, and renew our Game Plan.

In this renewed Chapter Two of our evolving union 💞, we are looking into 2026 with new eyes & moving forward with renewed hope towards a promised rewarding Life 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨

It's gonna be different.

It's gonna be interesting.

It's gonna be good for US.

*February 7, 2026 - NATIONAL MARRIAGE WEEK #1~Self-Care 2026; Coalinga/CA: https://roadgypsiesvalandholland.blogspot.com/2026/02/national-marriage-week-1self-care-2026.html

NATIONAL MARRIAGE WEEK #1-2026~Self-Care; Coalinga-CA

National Marriage Week 2026 will be observed from February 7 to 14. The theme for this year is "Man and Woman He Created Them: Together With Purpose."

Marriage - a Christian Marriage - is a Sacred Covenant.

A Covenant Marriage is much more than a blending of 2 lives & a setting up of a home … it is a spiritual union ideally suited to help you know Elohim's character more fully and intimately; it is a disciplined life that draws you and your spouse closer to Yeshua in ways that will hone your character to more fully example the life and love lessons He lived, exampled, & taught. The sacredness of this special intimate covenant is enriched by the guidance of the Ruach HaKo'desh as He guides you both into a deeper understanding of merciful love that reaps humble gratitude and profound thankfulness. Whether it is delightful - or difficult, your unfolding, enriching, and rewarding 3-cord-marriage will become a closer walk with Hashi'lush HaKo'desh (the Trinity). Everything about your marriage; from the history you and your spouse are creating, to the love you share, & ultimately to the forgiveness you both will learn to offer and seek - will be favored with the sacred capacity to help you grow in Yeshua's character: thus fulfilling Elohim's purpose for your Union.

During Holland's bachelor years, and during my widowing years, we had both been praying that our lives would not settle into a boring landscape as our senior years were creeping up on us - and man! Elohim delivered in a big way!

John Michael Montgomery - How Was I to Know: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mx2ToUji1Wo&list=RD1o4s1KVJaVA&index=10

Holland was a major surprise - with more machismo than I had ever experienced before. He was mega macho - tenuously balanced with a big heart full of big love.

My 5'2" self was not a surprise to Holland (he'd visually seen me decades ago & had patiently been waiting for me to show up, in the flesh) … but my 6' attitude was not foreseen; nor was it appreciated when it entered his life.

The macho driven machismo, & the short shot of whiskey in a tea cup, set us both back a pace; and seriously put out marriage in jeopardy. Holland wanted a traditional "Biblical Wife!" -  and I wanted a gentler giant to submit to. Needless to say: tensions were high, triggers were tripped, and both of us were behaving badly during those flareups.

Johnny Cash, June Carter Cash - Jackson:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpPzk-41RJI&list=RDTpPzk-41RJI&start_radio=1

Holland was not the kind of man I was used to - he didn't give ground. on anything, for any reason. His word was Law.

I was not the kind of woman Holland was used to - I didn't step back, back down, or tremble when his voice rose & shook the rafters. I stood ground; and sometimes, gave back tit to his tat (no pun intended; this was no joking matter).

The first 2 years were rough. But I never doubted that with him, I'd always be protected, sheltered & looked after: even when he was frustrated, or angry with me. And he never doubted that with me, he'd be looked after, sheltered - hands down, and tended to: even when frustration was high and my eyes were shooting daggers.

I'd been a Wife for 44 years before widowhood demoted me: my understanding is that marriage is a sacred undertaking.

Holland had been a bachelor for decades - and raised in a testosterone driven atmosphere all of his Life: his understanding of marriage was totally clueless all the way around.

We had a LOT to learn about each other.

We had good friends who came alongside us and offered words of loving encouragement, and reminding us that the first two years of a new marriage are the hardest; and most trying on the nerves.

We also knew that Elohim Himself had orchestrated our coming together … knowing He was "for us", we anchored ourselves in Him, His unfailing Word, and trusting Yeshua's healing power.

We are building our Home's foundation this year, on the  Solid Rock: 3 CORD = Us, Elohim, & His Word. In spliced pliancy, strength is built.

We are friends. We love each other - and keeping that front and center during those 24 months of baptism by fire, we hung on.

Sometimes with fingernails that threatened to fail.

"Forgive-Forget-Move Forward" became a looping mantra.

I am - and will always be a Daughter of the Most High God first; after that, I am Holland's Wife. And being Mrs. Holland Redmill is an assignment from Heaven - a devine trust we both feel honored to be favored with.

So, when we celebrated our 3rd Year Wedding Anniversary, a month ago, Holland said, "This is the year we will begin to build a new life. I love you, Baby."

We started our New Life together 37 months ago, with hope towards a happy future; and despite the cold winds that occasionally blew through & disturbed our blissful bubble, the hope held.

February 10th, 2023 Post: ONE MONTH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY: https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2023_02_10_archive.html

I'm okay with kickstarting the New Life Dream and building a refreshed New Life. That's what a covenant marriage is - commitment, dedication, & restarts if necessary.

So far, 2026 has been very good to us.

Finishing my morning coffee - and shifting my potted plants to a sunny window … I noticed a newly emerging stem emerging from the potting soil; eventually these spindly growths will flesh out to become another interesting zig-zag shape resembling a fish skeleton. The Fishbone Cactus is not a desert cacti plant - it is actually a succulent jungle plant that grows on trees, in the crotch of jungle trees:

New growth pushing up through the potting soil.

And turning from the dining table - I caught sight of a cute little song bird touching down to perch on the hand rail alongside the front door … but flew off before I could get my camera. This is what it looked like - and this is the birdsong I wake up to every morning:

California Towhee; Almond Oasis RV Park-CA

Spring Song of the California Towhee: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZeft08Mrb8

Then,  I engaged in some lower body toning exercises. The Darebee Demeter Workout is designed to be a lower body workout that helps develop strength in muscles and tendons, ligaments, and support muscle groups. It is suitable for individuals of various fitness levels, including those who are 69 years old. The workout is non-equipment and focuses on strength training, which is generally safe for older adults. However, it is always recommended to consult with a healthcare professional before starting any new workout routine, especially if you have any pre-existing health conditions or concerns;  listen to your body & stop if pain is excessive.

Muscles used.

This workout is generally safe for most individuals, but if you have knee or back issues, it's best to consult a fitness professional for personalized guidance. Form & technique for each exercise is shown below. Aim for 10 reps x2 EA exercise.

Bent Leg Extensions Kickbacks

Bent Side Leg Extensions Kick

Double Glute Flex Lift

Double Glute Lift exercise video: 

(https://workoutguru.fit/exercises/lying-double-glute-lift-female-video-exercise-guide-tips-641512/)

Glute Bridge

Half-Wipers

V-Extensions  Adductor Stretch

Side Lying Clamshells

My hands have been aching with overuse (because I always push the envelope when designing & working on a project), so Holland suggested we seize the sunny day, enjoy a day out of house, & bring pizza back for Supper: YES!

After supper, we were treated to a pretty sunset - and the Day was so pleasant, we left the front door open until darkness settled & the moon rose:

Lovely ending to a lovely Day; Almond Tree Oasis RV Park; Coalinga-CA

While my husband was sprawled on his recliner enjoying a short snooze, I noticed the leaves on the Amaryllis bulb are proliferating and lengthening - so, I pulled some old knitting needles, and used those as stakes to hold the leaves upright & corralled …

Amaryllis leaves staked & contained; and a Spring Book Cover slipped over tonight's read.

A Clive Cussler Novel; tonight's choice.

And when I felt my sore hands itching to reach for my WIP; I quickly grabbed a book to read and headed upstairs to lay down - keeping my self-care covenant, and treating my hands kindly.

THE NEXT 36 HOURS~Shabbat Eve; Coalinga-CA

I am resting my hands today - I overworked 😟 them yesterday & into today's dawning: didn't put it aside & get into bed until 8 AM 😳⏰ : I know … but, I wanted to get the entire striped afghan panel done. The panel is done; and so are my poor aching hands until Monday 📅📌. I'm carving out my 24-hr. Shabbat Island of Rest ☝️🏝️✡️🕯️ & Holland's Sunday routine ✝️ for [down time] = and that's all I'll be doing for the next 36 hours 💖

The Day played out beautifully with glorious bird-song-sunshine warmth 🌞🐦😁: I was glad for my transition lenses 👓

Another open-door Day; 75-degrees this afternoon. The sunshine was so bright, I was glad for my photochromic eyewear lenses.

Before the Day moved into it's rest period … I slipped into the bunk room for a little body toning session; hand usage was very minimal, but the payoff will be very beneficial 💪😉👌

The Darebee Fab Abs workout is designed for upper body power, & delivers a strong abs, and a strong core. The cross-mix exercise sets deliver a potent abs workout that demands you raise your knees to waist height during High Knees and keep your body as absolutely straight as you possibly can during the  plank. Planking burns more calories, when done every day, than other core exercises like sit-ups. More importantly, planks help strengthen massive muscle groups in your body. Having strong muscles means you burn more calories, even when you’re at rest. Many experts now recommend planking rather than crunches or sit-ups, since planks put less strain on your spine and hip flexors.

Planks don’t just work your core: They work your entire body. Planks require your arms, your legs, and all of your abs, making them an all-encompassing workout and a more efficient way to exercise.

Count EA set this way (without rushing the count)~One Potato, Two Potato, Three Potato', ect. EA count approximates a second. Form & Technique explained and exampled below.

This workout is a perfect program for seniors who are not used to exercise … and anyone who is trying to stay active without overloading the body (which is me). The program only includes standing exercises and can be scaled up or down - depending on one’s fitness level.

Balance exercises like Standing High Knees become more important as you age. High knees are a popular cardio drill, but you don’t have to worry about speed to see mobility benefits from this exercise. You don’t need a lot of time or space for high knees. This drill, like other balance exercises, can fit into different parts of your day. Try doing high knees while standing in your kitchen in the morning or while brushing your teeth at night.

If you need to, hold onto something while performing balance exercises, stand near a chair or counter for support. You can do high knees every day, but if you start to notice any pain or discomfort, take a break.

Standing High Knees~Aim for at least 12 reps on EA leg

The Standing Elbow Plank Hold can be safe for a 69-year-old woman to do, provided she has proper form and technique. It is a low-impact exercise that can help improve core strength, balance, and posture. However, seniors with pre-existing medical conditions or injuries should consult their doctor before attempting planks. It is also important to start with shorter hold times and gradually increase as strength and comfortability improve. Seniors should listen to their body and stop immediately if they feel any pain or discomfort.

The primary purpose of the plank is to burn belly fat, so if you allow your stomach to relax and hang lose while holding the plank position, you won’t get the desired results. Therefore, keep the stomach sucked in, and make sure your shoulders, back, and butt are evenly in line.

SHORT VERSION; Standing Elbow Plank Hold~hold 15-30 secs.

EXTENDED VERSION; Standing Elbow Plank Hold~hold 15-30 secs.

For a 69-year-old woman, it is generally safe to hold a plank for 15 to 30 seconds with good form. This duration is considered an excellent marker of strong functional core endurance at this stage of life. It is important to maintain proper form and technique to avoid strain and injury. If she can hold a plank for 30 seconds, it is a sign of strong core stability and endurance.

The Standing Mountain Climber Planks can be safe for a 69-year-old woman if she follows proper form and technique. It is a low-impact exercise that can improve core strength, balance, and posture - assisting with stability, posture and spinal alignment. However, it is crucial to start with shorter hold times and gradually increase as strength and comfortability improve. If she has any pre-existing medical conditions or injuries, she should consult her doctor before attempting planks. It is also important to start with modified versions of the exercise and gradually work up to more advanced versions. Seniors should listen to their body and stop immediately if they feel any pain or discomfort.

Standing Mountain Climber Planks; Muscular strength~10-15 reps x2 (controlled with your core engaged).

Stretches (like mountain climbers) can elevate your flexibility levels and reduce injury. Every time you repeat the mountain climber motion, you loosen up your hip and knee joints, improving range of motion and enhancing overall function.

I hit the "recommended 6,000-8,000 steps" goal (8,048 😊) today; I racked up 3.3 miles in walking; I'm on target for my exercise minutes/daily = 30 minutes recommended; I'm burning more calories on average than previously (double, actually); my heart rate is at a healthy tempo; on the hole, my respiratory rate has improved; I'm doing okay in the [6 minute walk] estimation = not good, not bad; middle of the road = my cardio fitness readout says I'm below average … but I'm not average 😉: considering that I am dealing with heart arrhythmia & asthma, I think I'm doing well at ranking a little over the halfway mark to "average" 👌 

Before the sun set, I gave a listen to Shalom in Messiah Ministries 💻🎧

Is the Remnant Church Crumbling Under Pressure? | Brandon Holthaus: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4kY-76PhEk

The normalization of antisemitism 👹 in America, is alarming 😔 - that it has taken root in people who claim to be "a Christian", warming "church ⛪️" seats is horrific & scandalous. Career pastors 👺, hired to speak what is palatable & trendy are not Christian in any sense of the actual meaning - and they are not teaching actual Scripture ✝️📖: they are mouthpieces for the government, and are teaching government propaganda: it is shocking to see people who do not know the Word, elevated to leadership positions 👺 It is shocking to realize how many people "gathering to worship" have no idea why they are gathering - and sniff offendedly at the "very thought!" that they are dangerously open to unsound teaching voices and devilish conclusions 😈

The Scriptures, and the Gospels, clearly convey the understanding that is a person is an anti-Semite, they are not walking with Elohim & they are not Christians; they are not followers of Christ. Christ obeyed Elohim in all things - including the inclusion of Jews. Yeshua is Messiah 👑 He founded and established the First Church = Messianic Body of Believers = JEWS & Gentiles; "to the Jews, first" ☝️🕎🕊️✝️

Replacement theology ✍️😈 has been around for generations. It rose up in America with a vengeance in the 1960's, and spread it's toxic message to 95% of modern christendom in the 1980's. Entertainment became more important than Elohim's clear message. Ego bred selfishness, which led to wickedness 👹 People no longer guarded thier eyes, ears, or tongue; feeding on garbage led many down the primrose path to destruction 💔  Scripture teaches that we, who call ourselves Christians ✝️👑, are to guard our eyes and ears = tune out the world and tune into Elohim's word & Yeshua's example.

It is vital to be actually walking through this Life with guidance the Ruach HaKo'desh 🙏🕊️

And with that last thought, I am now shutting the world and all it's distraction out 🤦🏻‍♀️😵‍💫🔌

At least throughout this 36 hour period of Earth time ⏱️