WILDFLOWER~2024

August 10th: I've lived with Holland for 19 months - I can gauge his moods pretty well, now: and he's learned that I can give as good as I get, and still stay rooted ;-)

Holland has a short fuse (I do too, but his is a whole lot shorter than mine) … and when he's frustrated, he says a lot he doesn't mean: he's just blowing off steam. And I give him a wide berth until his temper cools down: I learned he cools off quicker if I go mute (I go into another room, or I go for a drive). He will never physically hurt me, but his barbed words can cut deep; sometimes they are hard to forget.

And he's always sorry about an hour later.

When I blow my fuse, I really do mean what comes out of my mouth … so, I run my fuse a little longer before the explosion occurs. But once someone has lit that fuse, my forgiveness recovery time takes about a day or two, before I'm ready to accept an apology.

I deliberately drag out the 'welcome back into my life', because I don't want him to think he can keep hurting me with far flung barbed words and saying he's sorry - I know he really is sorry, but I want a change in character, and behavior, that comes with the sorry.

I want him to stop thinking he knows better than I do what's best for me. I married him knowing he has health issues, and physical limitations: I am not blind or stupid. I fell in love with him - I was not looking for supplemental income (didn't need it, I was doing fine by myself with my income), or a stud muffin hunk (who needs the attitude that comes with that? Not me!); and it really makes me mad when his, 'I want a divorce!' verbal hurls center around those two meaningless (to my way of thinking) issues. If, as he imagines, I {deserve better}; I would have stayed a solo lobo and avoided all of it.

He's {hunky} enough for me; and in this case MY opinion is the only one, he should be focusing on.

He is a "big deal" to me: no one else on Earth, can fill my Life, like HE does.

He does not know better than I do, about {what is best} for me.

Especially when he is in a black mood.

Wildflowers are hardy plants that thrive in adverse circumstances; all my life, I’ve suffered adverse circumstances and attitude tempests that seem to center around love relationships - parental, siblings, marriage, children, grandchildren …

Apparently Elohim thinks I'm badass enough to weather the storms looming on the horizons of my continual evolving Life, without being seriously harmed or damaged too much.

I have learned throughout my life seasons, that everyone suffers tragedy at some point in their life; you can either wail, wring your hands and let tragedy overwhelm you … or, you can dry your eyes, determine to live despite the sorrow, and thrive in spite of it all.

So I thrive: I do not want to disappoint Elohim ;-)

I am a wildflower.

Tom Petty - 'Wildflowers' w-Lyrics: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRKS8Nd-SjA)

While watching the river this afternoon … at Austin Point, and later at Martin's Bluff beachfront.

Is the tugboat leading - or tugging on the trailing ship 'Pacific Honor'? Pacific Honor is a bulk cargo ship built in 2011, flying the flag of Portugal; home port is Maderia, an autonomous region of Portugal - an archipelago comprising 4 islands off the northwest coast of Africa. It is known for its namesake wine and warm, subtropical climate. The main island of Madeira is volcanic, green and rugged, with high cliffs, pebbly beaches and settlements on deltas of the Fajã River.

A following tug to help where ever the ship sets up; this is the first tug of it's kind I've ever seen, but I know what it is used for ;-)

White Egrets in a hay field; a white egret is a symbol of good fortune, prosperity, new beginnings, wealth, and wisdom. I can embrace behind those sentiments ;-)

White Egret; Internet Pic: 

(https://www.allaboutbirds.org/news/how-to-identify-white-herons-excerpt-from-better-birding-book/)

Martin's Bluff beachfront; Woodland-WA

Crumbly gypsum, used for sheetrock wallboard; & drywall mud, used for plaster work; Holland's line of work before he retired.

While we sat and watched river activity, we discussed how much time we both wasted on anger, this past year.

Our honeymoon year, for Pete's sake; a year that should have been blissfully happy, was overshadowed by bad behavior coming from both of us; he'd start it, and I'd finish it - it was a constant stinging fireworks display :-(

Holland said, "Yeah, I guess I do have a short fuse - it was a lot shorter when I was younger, but at this age I try to rein it in because high blood pressure will lead to stroke, or heart attack; and you said the other day that you want me to stick around for a long time to come". Then, he shot me his killer sexy smile, and I said, "So, now that we have that situation understood, next time you pop a vein and announce, 'I can't take anymore - I want a divorce!'; I won't shoot you a fiery response... I'll just get busy with a yarn project, smile sweetly, and say, 'We're having pot roast for Supper tonight - do you want potatoes, or yams?'"

Then, we laughed.

It felt good to laugh. We know in our hearts, that neither one of us is going anywhere.

Today was also a day of growth and moving forward progress.

We are only going to focus on the good things :-)

We both like things to flow smoothly.

Things work better for our Life if there are no snafus to wade through - now that the issues have been sorted, and we are moving forward together … things can only get better :-D

STERNWHEELER PARK; La Center-WA

August 8th: Everything was creeping along today, in slo-mo: including me.

My lower back was on fire when I woke up this morning - I want the repairs on Independence to be done asap (!) … my spine needs that massaging memory foam mattress for lumbar support, and both our lungs need the adjustable, electric bed frame.

PAIN-PAIN-PAIN; fused tail bone.

Sacralization = Fused Tailbone:  (https://www.healthline.com/health/sacralization & https://www.healthline.com/health/si-joint-stretches)

I want my bed back! Asap!!

Seven weeks on this motel mattress is wrecking my back :-(

Walking across the motel room had me sweating and moaning with the pain burn; Holland wanted to call off the Park visit … but I said, "No, Hon; I need to walk. Walking will actually ease the pain, some. I want to go - I need to go." He wasn't so sure. But, in the end, he agreed.

Walking is a quick and low-impact exercise for lower back pain; walking is gentler on the sacroiliac joint than running or jogging, and has the added benefit of being easy to fit into a regular schedule: and has a low injury rate.

Holland prefers the freeway, but bridge work in Woodland is still crawling along; so Holland drove the back road to La Center - (((YIPPIE!)))

Back roads are my favorite drives to get anywhere … and I like this particular drive. I've been missing it :-)

Destination route: 12 min (6 mi) via E CC St. & NW Pacific Hwy-WA

La Center — Thumbnail History:

https://dev.historylink.org/File/9450

This Park is located in the heart of La Center - directly across from the 'Last Frontier Poker Room' Casino: in the past, Holland did work on this casino following a gruesome incident that required clean-up work and repair work.

He pulled into a parking area, and I suggested he leave me at this spot and park across the way - where I'd join him at the end of the trail: the upper trail I could see didn't seem too long to walk.

We veered off in different directions …

Something new.

Sternwheeler Park: #100 W 4th St, La Center, WA

Pretty Butterfly Bush.

I had assumed that the trail would begin with a gentle sloping footpath; I was unprepared for a back-jarring decent.

The Park path began at the foot of tiered steps.

But, I was game.

I'm starting here …

The Park has a nice layout … and features, along the trails.

The brick spaces need to be refilled.

Sunny 'Stella De'Oro' Daylilies.

'Black-eyed Susan's'; Rudbeckia.

Holland keeping a careful eye on his stubborn wife's progress ;-)

The back burn wasn't as bad as when I started - but I was feeling relief that the trail was ending. Normally, I would stretch walking out, but today would not be a good day to do that.

Thinking I would be joining Holland soon, I was surprised when the snaky brick-paved trail led away from Holland & Betsy, before it brought me back to them.

Interesting little sculpture grove …

Giant carved mushroom.

Moss-backed tadpoles & smiling mama frog ;-)

More walking trails with a Gazebo & carved Eagle.

History Info Plaque

La Center-WA, Steamer Era: (https://www.pacific-hwy.net/steamers.htm) & 

Captain Minnie Mae Mossman Hill: (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minnie_Mossman_Hill)

Log Flume: (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Log_flume)

& River Pig: 

(https://www.pearldistrictportfolio.com/pearl-district-news/whats-a-river-pig & https://spokanehistorical.org/items/show/587)

By the time I wove my way back over the hilly switch-back trails, to where I had seen Betsy parked (a grand total of 12 minutes from start to finish), I was covered with a sheen of sun induced sweat, as well as pain burn sweat … but when Holland looked at me with his empathetic tender brown eyes, I felt beautiful in a way that only my husband can make me feel :-)

Fun, but it's good and done ;-)

And Holland has a surprise for me: he extended my out-of-house experience further, by driving up W 4th Street and into the countryside a while before turning around and heading back to Woodland.

Love in action :-D

As we neared Woodland, he asked, "Do you feel up to going to the river for a bit?"

Yes!

We drove to Austin Point, and sat for a while listening to the gentle lapping of the river waves - and watched a dredger deepen the Columbia River's shipping channel, for a while.

The day was sunny, and unfolded with a peaceful vibe.

Osprey nest still empty.

A schooner close to shore …

The dredger turned around very quick.

Boating season brings questions about maintenance of Columbia River, its tributaries:

https://www.columbian.com/news/2024/jun/17/boating-season-brings-questions-about-maintenance-of-columbia-river-its-tributaries/

Port of Woodland will review the potential of riverside development:

https://www.thereflector.com/stories/port-of-woodland-will-review-the-potential-of-riverside-development,300139

Dragonflies flitted all around Betsy …

… and Holland batted his camo hat around, to shoo sand wasps out of Betsy's cab, so I wouldn't get stung (I'm severely allergic to bee, wasp, hornet, yellow jacket, ect. stings).

Sand Wasps: (https://www.angi.com/articles/wasp-types.htm)

Leaving the river behind on our way homeward, we saw several herons in the freshly gleaned fields … and freeway traffic, still crawling forward as bridge work creeps along :-(

A heron in the field; there were many.

Freeway traffic was still creeping along …

WHITE BEE HONEY; Woodland-WA

August 7th: It was pretty hot today, so we made a couple trips to the river where the cooling breeze was very welcome.

On our morning trip, as we were parked and enjoying the breeze, I looked across the river - and saw what I thought was a raft, and said, "What on earth is a raft doing cruising down the Columbia River dangerously close to the shipping channel?" Holland followed my gaze and said it was a mini tug.

I've never heard of … or seen … a mini tug before; they are little.

A mini tug! I've never seen anything like it …

Pictures of Mini Tugs: 

(https://forum.gcaptain.com/t/they-might-be-small-but-these-tiny-boats-still-serve-a-purpose-for-the-us-navy/56496)

Turning my eyes from the mini tug as it rounded the river's bend, I saw two large tug boats making their way speedily upriver from Portland-OR. They passed right in front of us, cruising through the fishing boats gathered to angle for salmon.

I started laughing as they cruised by, saying they look like giant house slippers - I know: I am a weirdo, and I own that ;-)

Following in the wake waves, were two older cabin cruisers with dinghy's.

Two tugs chugging up the river from Portland-OR.

As they passed, I laughed & said 'they look like giant house slippers' ;-)

Shaver Tug Service: 

(https://shavertransportation.com/)

1960's era Cabin Cruiser 'yachts'.

Leaving Austin Point, we noticed that the osprey nest was still empty (there had been no youngster activity when we drove in, either): the fledglings have flown on sun-warmed wings.

This is the third day we have noticed that the nest is empty most of the day; I am happy for the maturing birds, even though I am missing seeing them there everyday.

Life moves forward - theirs, as well as ours :-)

The Osprey nest is empty most of the day now … the fledglings will soon abandon it, altogether.

Driving the back dike homeward, we passed a 'honey for sale' sign; so, Holland backtracked and we carried honey jars and honey samples back to the motel room, with us.

We have been trying for months to buy local honey, in various locations: I am glad we were able to make purchase this afternoon.

Local Honey!

White Bee Honey Co.; #206 Whalen Rd, Woodland, WA:  (https://whitebeehoneycompany.com/about)

We bought 2 jarred flavored honeys … and 8 flavored Honey Stix. The black honey Stix tastes to me, like sweet molasses; I like it :-)

Relaxing and trying to stay cool, in the motel room, I went online to check out some more things to do in the general area - a Park in La Center came up … and I think I will do that tomorrow.

It looks interesting ;-)

It was still stifling warm, so we drove back down to the river just before sunset; and spent about an hour there.

Gold gilded river, at sunset. Beautiful.

Leaving, we could see that the smokey wildfire haze had tinted the sun, & water, a rosy hue.

Though the sky told us there was smoke in the air, it did not hurt our lungs.

Thank You, Yeshua ;-)