LIMITATIONS; Coalinga-CA

I'm taking 1 day at a time, doing what I can with the new limitations (wildfire smoke, dustups, a move back to the PNW): and giving the rest to Elohei – trusting in His care and resting in His perfect peace that passes all human understanding; waiting on tenterhooks for Elohei to work everything concerning us out. I gotta tell you … patience is not a strong point for me: waiting is very hard right now.

And, I'm doing my best to rein my temper in. I do not want to go back up north, and I really feel that Holland's lungs would do much better if he'd lay off the chew and family visitations; but he refuses to do either, claiming he is "not a pet that backs down to your demands."

#1 - I don't want a pet; of any caliber: and I won't be someone's bitch, either. I don't mistreat … and I won't be mistreated.

#2 - I am not demanding. I am requesting limitations to ease his life, and make our life together less chancy. I do not want to be a widow again.

His lungs have gotten a lot worse since he started chewing - and now he's using his nebulizer machine every night. He's just got to have some kind of vice in his life; he's not happy unless he's pickled in misery of some sort.

He went from Vicodin to smokeless chew … and refuses to acknowledge that the chew is just as addictive as the Vicodin: and just as dangerous for his health.

{{Cough (his coughing is pretty severe, now), sputum (he's been doing a lot of this for at last 2 years), shortness of breath (really having trouble talking, now, without running out of breath), dysphagia (not an issue right now - if anything, he has gained a significant amount of weight), snoring (not too bad; men snore), and apnea-hypopnea (I haven't noticed anything like this) were found to be significantly increased in smokeless tobacco users}}

#2 - I have given in to a lot of my husband's demands since we began this life journey together … and because his lungs have gotten so much worse due to his stubborn, taunting dance, with the Grim Reaper (the redmill curse) - I'll be giving up more; and that's okay. That's what spouses are supposed to do to support and ease one another's life. I'm still waiting for Holland to get that message. I'm not sure he ever will.

Things that make my husband's lungs hurt and breathing very difficult:

dusty places = the primary reason we're heading back north, the end of this month: and future traveling will probably be just be his drives to Kelso-WA. Alone. I don't like dancing with the Grim Reaper - I've already done that, and found him to be a dedicated soul collector.

fumes, such as car exhausts.

smoke = another sticky subject; Holland's SIL, and only living sibling, Mark, both smoke like chimneys … and when we are in the PNW, he is constantly in Kelso-WA, sitting in Lana's kitchen & Mark's livingroom breathing in the toxic cigarette (Lana) & lung-searing-pot fumes (Mark); and picking fights with me when he gets back home because his lungs hurt and he's got a raging headache.

air freshener sprays or plug-ins = I'm very careful with bathroom air fresheners (getting the mildest & using the concentrated gelled ones when they are available); plug-ins are ignored when we go down that store aisle.

strong-smelling cleaning products (unless there's plenty of ventilation); again, I'm very careful.

hairspray = I haven't styled my hair in months - and that's okay; a road gypsy lifestyle is not a fancy lifestyle.

perfume = I can let this fall by the wayside; most of my life I haven't been able to be around perfumes, after shave, or pungent under-arm-deodorants. About 5 years ago I realized my body chemistry had changed and I could enjoy some perfumes - but letting that go would not really be a hard sacrifice.

All the things listed above should be avoided with my asthmatic lungs also. I've got to clean house, but I clean with ventilation, and I'm careful about the pungency of the cleaners. Sweeping can get dicey because it stirs up dust; vacuuming really isn't a good alternative, because it uses very strong smelling aerosol cleaners. I'm as careful as I can be with our lungs situation: Holland just flat-out flirts with death - and I'm not liking that dance card my husband insists be booked with Mr. Grim's presence.

The other morning when I woke up to his strenuous coughing that scared me awake, I felt sorry for him and was agreeable to head back up north. But this mornings temper tantrum had me pulling back my sympathy and engaging the angry wife mode.

I'm at my wit's ends with my husband's stubborn egomania.

So, I'm going to be focusing the majority of my attention on self-care. I don't flirt with death. And suicide lifestyles do not excite me. I'm actually pretty angry with my husband right now; so I'm limiting conversations with him; I'm limiting time spent with him. I'm tired of the never-ending fights, that shouldn't escalate into fights to start with.

I need space.

Lots of it.

That's how I'll be living, when we get back to the PNW. Holland refuses to grow up and behave like an adult. He refuses to see life beyond his own nose. He doesn't understand that there is give and take in Life … life does not revolve around his wants, desires, or demands. He feels constrained by "the chains of marriage"; and he's diligently working at making me a widow again. I'm not okay with any of this. And all of this is due to Holland's limiting selfish actions & behaviors.

I'm not happy.

I need space.

Lots of it.

Part of that self-care includes taking care of the body Yeshua designed, created, and housed my spirit in. Today, I did a little [soft cardio]:

Exercise heart rate: this is the only way from now on that I will allow my heart beats to pick up speed.

Today's Calorie Calculations, Exercise Minutes, Standing Minutes + 4,601 steps = approximately 2.004 miles

On top of everything else, I heard a sharp pop when I opened my laptop - and saw that the screen is pulling away from the fold-down-keyboard cover. I did what I could to minimize the damages, but having gone through this before, I know the whole thing will need to be replaced, at some point; but for now it's working okay and there doesn't seem to be any  concerning limitations:

Last night, I started a new kitchen towel design to get my thoughts going in a different direction … and tonight I finished the set. It's not fancy, but working it up served a purpose, and it's use will also serve a purpose.

MOD Kitchen Towel Set finished.

MOD FALL VANDYKE ST KITCHEN TOWEL SET; Coalinga-CA:  (https://roadgypsiesvalandholland.blogspot.com/2025/09/mod-fall-vandyke-st-kitchen-towel-set.html)

HANFORD & NEWSCUM'S GHOST TRAIN-CA

September 7th: Holland's cousin Brad, is here in CA for a week or two, before he goes back home to TX … so, this morning we drove to Hanford-CA to visit with him at his father's house.

This family is Holland's favorite family memory: these people are special. I've met most of them over the past 2 years, but this will be my first time meeting and spending time with Brad. First impressions are important - there is only one chance to make a 1st impression.

So, I took extra time getting ready to walk out the door, this morning:

Profusion 'Highlights' eyelid base, Hard Candy & Cover Girl purples eyeshadows; 'Auburn' Brow Gel; 'Blue Mist' Mascara; a blending of Coral & Rose-tint liquid blush; Rose Quartz Lip Gloss.

I'm going a 'lighter-touch' with the eyeshadow this year.

Full face on …

Ready to roll …

We made good time getting from here to George's house in Hanford-CA. Brad was very nice - he and Holland talked up a storm; catching up on the years that have passed since they last saw each other. Laughing with a memory, or a shared update. Conversation flowed easy & love vibes bounce doff the walls. It made my heart happy to see my husband so happy, and relaxed. I liked watching him be loved on by people who genuinely love him for who he is as a person, and not just tolerated because a bloodline is shared - or hated so much, legitimate acknowledgement is refused.                                                                                                 

Brenda was there too. I liked watching the cousinly interactions. I liked talking with Brenda; she is a very welcoming person - and it's not a put-on; she's just a loving soul. I am glad we are friends. I was momentarily surprised though when she asked Holland about bob redmill and his [church]. I was surprised because I couldn't imagine bob lowering himself to hang with anyone other than the redmills that idolize and openly worship him as their lord and messiah; I know Brenda would not have done any of that groveling! Then, I remembered that Holland's mother (Brenda's Aunt) would have been bob's SIL - and Brenda would have heard about bob through family convo's.

How did Brenda know that devil bob?

newscum's boondoggle runs right behind Uncle George's house …

newscum's 'train to nowhere' thieving foolery.

"newscum's light rail to nowhere" refers to CA's High-Speed Rail project, which has faced ballooning costs, long delays, and reduced scope from connecting San Francisco and Los Angeles to a much shorter segment in the Central Valley, leading critics like former Transportation Secretary Sean P. Duffy to label it a "boondoggle".

The original vision of a high-speed rail line between the state's two major cities has been scaled back to a 170-mile segment between Merced and Bakersfield in the Central Valley.

The project was initially approved by voters in 2008 (a decade and a half ago!) to connect San Francisco and Los Angeles for around $33 billion, but … like everything else in CA that newscum has anything to so with … costs have escalated drastically.

Critics, including former Transportation Secretary Sean P. Duffy, point to years of delays and budget overruns as evidence of mismanagement and wasteful spending, coining the term "ghost train".

Federal funding was terminated by President Trump's Administration in July 2025, & the U.S. Department of Transportation - citing mismanagement facts, terminated approximately $4 billion in unspent federal funding for the project: a decision Newscum is contesting through a lawsuit.

In response, Governor Newsom filed a lawsuit to protect the funds, arguing the project is legally valid and that the federal government is violating a binding agreement. 

Despite newscum's trump derangement anger issues & amped up  political theatrics, the future of the project remains uncertain, with ongoing debates about its cost, viability, and whether it can ever be completed. Most californians are of the opinion that newscum's train to nowhere has run it's course and is of no value to anyone, anymore, except newscum and his self-glorification aspirations of gaining the White House: he refuses to admit that his time, too, has come and gone. He is a walking disaster and has gone out of  his way to destroy California. He is certifiable crazy for thinking that an obviously failed governor has any hope at all of running the entire Nation of the USA.

Leaving Hanford-CA, Holland veered off the freeway, and treated me to a backroad drive that would link us with I-5 a bit down the highway. I was thankful - and grateful 😘

Holland treated me to a backroad drive, instead of freeway madness.

We saw a wildfire presence on the horizon as we passed the Lemoore Air Base; & 5 fire trucks passed by us - probably a changing of the guard as they were traveling towards Hanford; and we were traveling from Hanford.

Exiting Lemoore, I was really treated to rural sightseeing, when instead of reconnecting to I-5, Holland continued our backroad drive home through Huron-CA. I like that little town; it's kinda cool with it's mexican themed buildings. It is 98% mexican population - even with the Farmer's Market we went to there, 2 days ago, we were the only pale faces among all the faces. There are newer apartment buildings, gas stations, and stores … but basically it's a rural community off the beaten track.

Holland changed his mind about the freeway 100%, and we drove home through Huron-CA

Supper at home, was light - and I did a [light] exercise routine while Holland rested upstairs for about half an hour: 

For real flexibility gains, stretches need to be 2-5 minutes holds. A slow count of 60 is defined as 1 minute of time (a slow count of 60 = 1 minute of time).

The Darebee "Airplane" workout is a full-body, low-impact routine designed for seated exercises and static holds, to keep your muscles humming, your circulation going and your brain and attention lively after long periods of sitting.

This exercise routine is designed for muscle strength and toning.

The specific movements in the workout target these muscles: Abdominal - engaging the abs helps stabilize the upper body during seated leg lifts and twists; Lower back - this area is activated and stretched through torso twists and forward-folding movements; Calves: the routine includes calf raises and foot pumps that engage and stretch the calf muscles; Glutes and hamstrings - while performing moves like seated knee raises and forward folds, you gently activate and lengthen the muscles in your hips and the backs of your thighs; Hips and thighs - knee raises and tilts are designed to engage your thigh muscles and loosen your hips, easing the stiffness that comes with prolonged sitting; Shoulders and upper back - the routine includes shoulder rotations and overhead stretches that help release tension in the upper body; Neck - neck stretches and tilts help relieve tension that can build up from holding your head in a fixed position. 

When Holland got back up, we shut the AC off & opened the door to enjoy the coolness of the evening. I noticed the skin on my left elbow was looking rough … don't know what led to this allergic reaction, but I rubbed some cortisone cream on it.

It felt good to have the door open - I have missed that. Too wet & cold in WA~too dusty in AZ

Elbow owie. I'm going to rub some cortisone cream on it tonight; hopefully it will clear up.

Then, I peeled & cut some prickly pear fruit for us to snack on while Holland watched his YouTube subscriptions; and I found a cheesy B-rated sci-fi movie to watch.

Eating prickly pear cactus fruit while watching a movie.

Prickly pear fruit has a taste like a blend of watermelon & pomegranate; it is a nutritious, low-calorie food packed with fiber, antioxidants like betalains and polyphenols, and minerals like magnesium, potassium, and copper - play a role in regulating blood pressure. It also contains good amounts of Vitamin C, B-vitamins, and water, making it beneficial for digestion, immune support, hydration, and potentially blood sugar regulation. Antioxidants and fatty acids from the seeds can contribute to the health of skin and hair, though more research is needed.

While I was debating on watching my B-movie to it's boring end … Holland says, "Hey Baby - take a look at this video. Some Harvest Host went off the rails with her customers." I remembered our own RV host from Hell experience about a year or so ago; so, I asked, "It is the Rabbit Lady?" Holland laughed, and said, "No. Not her. But just as crazy." I watched the video he was showing me - and I am thinking that this Harvest Host will not be getting any business after abusing the Harvest Host Ambassadors …

Our Boondocking Host SNAPPED | RV Trip Gone Wrong: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-2k83nihIg)

Holland is suggesting another exploratory drive tomorrow … I think he just really likes to see me dolled up 😉

I finished watching my boring movie to the bitter end, and as I was getting up to go wash my makeup off, Holland said, "By the way, you looked real nice today. How about we go for a little drive tomorrow?"

You bet!

I'm all about the drive - but something is telling me, my husband is all about the "you looked real nice today" 😘 That's okay; I know he's been missing his flamboyant flamingo.

Whether or not makeup is happening tomorrow depends on Mr. Sun. There's no point putting it on if it's going to melt right back off.

EASY CYCLING~My Senior Exercise Plan; #12/Long Beach-WA

As we age, it becomes increasingly important to maintain an active lifestyle to enjoy life to the fullest - my life has no future plans for shuffling a walker across the room, so I exercise to remain flexible as well as reasonably toned … and heart-healthy.

However, not all seniors are able to engage in high-impact exercise (like my husband), and that is where pedal exercisers come in: pedal exercisers are low-impact exercise machines that can be used while seated. They provide a gentle workout for the legs and can help people with physical limitations improve their circulation, and strengthen their muscles. This pedal exerciser can also be used for simple arm toning exercise to keep shoulder and back muscles fluid in mobility and strength.

I have always exercised: exercise is a permanent part of me - who I am; and what I do; I don't think Holland shares that outlook, but I hope that he will join me in keeping fit and strengthened :-)

We drove into Longview yesterday to pick up some pain meds for Holland … there was quite a bit of snow still piled along the shoulders of the KM Mountain (which really isn't that high); we are praying snow at higher elevations everywhere between here and california, melts quickly, so we can make the Harris Family Gathering on the 15th.

While Holland was busy at the Pharmacy window, I strolled the aisles and was happy to see what I was hoping I would find …

FOUND it yesterday in Wal-Mart, so it came home with us ;-)

Oh no … these batteries are impossible to find! While I put it together (easy assembly), Holland went online to track replacement batteries, down - and found a source ;-)

Pedal exercisers are gentle exercise action for people (like both of us) who suffer arthritis flareups due to cold, damp, wet weather - as we have been experiencing down south, as well as here in the PNW - since November 2023.

Additionally, cycling exercises burn more calories in the same timeframe you would burn walking: BIG PLUS :-)

So, pedal exercisers are really a good choice all the way around, for seniors who want to tone muscles and lose weight, while keeping to their workout goals despite the weather … and if you are full-time RVr's like we are, they are perfect because they don't take up a lot of room when in use - and they easily fold up for small-space-storage.

This type of pedal exerciser has been in use for a long time; it’s a simple bicycle crank that you can adjust the resistance of, with a slight turn of the top screw-knob. It’s lightweight, and easy to use.

Easy to store when not in use - just remove the back screw-knob for compaction.

Seniors using the pedal exerciser for muscle toning and heart-health, should aim to engage in this low-compact exercise for 20-25 minutes a day; at least 2 or 3 times a week.

*FULL BODY WORKOUT~My Senior Exercise Plan; #11/Long Beach-WA https://roadgypsiesvalandholland.blogspot.com/2024/03/full-body-workoutmy-senior-exercise.html