LIBERATING PAIN~Self-Care & Personal Growth; Castle Rock-WA

The Homespun Wife - 'The Truth About My Son': 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgfkRu5Fg54&t=372s)

I understand Sherry's struggle - and I've heard those self-righteous voices that are arrogantly ignorant of the realities of Life: we are loaned our children  yes, we carry them in our bodies, we birth them … and we raise them in Christian homes. BUT our children are only on loan - and they have FREE WILL; they will go their own way: and we have to let them go. It is hard. It is hard because we love them with a mother's heart & we do not want them to struggle with life's hardships.

But you know what? Elohim loves them, too; and He sees the end game result of their Life. When we step aside and allow them to struggle - that's when HE steps in and can DO what needs doing in their lives. We also have to remember that we, all of us, are vessels in the hands of our creator. Only the Creator knows the usefulness of each vessel & that usefulness is at His discretion - this may sound harsh, but if we claim to be Bible-believing-Christians, then we have to believe every word in The Word. Our children - whether obedient and faithful; or rebellious and wayward - teach us the love of our Father. Sometimes that love involves discipline, for benefit: some children will learn the disciplinary lesson - some will not. Some children will learn, turn, & accept Life - some will not. We have to remember also, where to FOCUS OUR EYES. This world, and EVERYTHING in it - including our children can & will be used by Lucifer to keep our hearts sorrowing and our eyes on the problem instead of the solution. Yeshua is the solution. Maintaining OUR sanctification, so we finish the race, is our goal.

Since my daughter, at 9 years of age, started her hate campaign - got involved with drugs at age 14 - stormed out of our home at age 16 - tried to end her life at 17 - took up with an abusive boyfriend at age 19 - and gleefully burned the bridge to any hope at all of reconciliation, following her father's death, when she was 43 … I struggled to make sense of the situation. I cried rivers of tears. I prayed until my head ached with the intensity. I held on to hope when my heart threatened to shatter into a million pieces: there were times I thought I'd lose my marbles worrying about her: Where is she? Is she eating? Does she have clothes to wear? Does she have adequate shelter? Is she even still alive? Thank the Lord my husband was my anchor & my walk with Elohim was strong. I never got to the place of hopelessness; I believe I would have withered away if that had happened. She did bless us with 2 much loved grandchildren, and we did offer her shelter (that eventually ended disastrously due to her temper flares) throughout all those years. But it took me a very long time to release the situation and stand by to "watch the salvation of the Lord".

A burnt bridge forced me finally, to let go. I've come to understand that Elohim's ways are always the best ways.

This recording by Sherry also fits:

The Homespun Wife - 'When You Are Rejected': 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zs6pQP_FQ-s)

This is my New Life mantra, now; every day, every week - on an endless repeat.

In the unwanted darkness of a child's betrayal & rejection abandonment, I have grown and gained strength in ways I can appreciate, now.

I've learned that pain has a place, & a purpose in everyone's Life.

I've gained wisdom in the prolonged silence of waiting.

Patience has taken root in the waiting.

I have not heard from Stacey; or been allowed to have any communication at all with my grandchildren since June of 2020. And you know what? I didn't die of heartbreak … I grew in strength because the weight was off my shoulders, and in Elohim's hands, where it always belonged. I started building a Life that didn't hold place anymore for sadness, sorrow, or "what if": I learned to "relax & let God." I love my daughter & I miss her. I love my grandchildren & miss them. But I love Elohim more than the missingness & I KNOW HE loves them MORE than I ever could. I've done my part - now, I have to stand aside & allow Him to do His part. I don't know if I will live long enough to see my daughter or grandchildren, again. And I've learned to be okay with that. Elohim knows. And I've learned to rest in the assurances of Elohim's promises.

PETE HEGSETH vs MOUTHY MARK KELLY

GOOD 👏

Speaking as a military brat, born in a Naval Hospital & raised military, I hope this gremlin-faced devil 👿 will be stripped of his military awards, lose his DC seat … and in MHO, prison, with ALL penalties related to TREASON 🤬 should follow.

Pentagon investigates Arizona Sen. Mark Kelly over video urging troops to defy illegal orders: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f7VWXZNmvJ4)

And that frame of mind should be extended to EVERY PERSON who joined Kelly in his smart-assed seditious video clip, he rebelliously released to the public, encouraging treasonous behavior and action.

The obamanite mantra is always, "no one is above the Law!"

Kelly, and his dimwitted, goose-stepping morons, are about to feel the effects of their mutinous bitchiness.

‘BACKFIRED’: Sen Mark Kelly faces possible court martial over ‘illegal orders’ video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jc1b4ANtxEY

{{Pete Hegseth takes action against Sen. Mark Kelly, who egged on military to defy Trump in viral video

~Story by Andi Shae Napier

Secretary of War Pete Hegseth on Monday began taking steps to demote Democratic Arizona Sen. Mark Kelly from his current military rank over his role in a viral video telling U.S. service members and spy agencies they must “refuse illegal orders” by the Trump administration.

Hegseth posted a statement to social media saying the Pentagon is taking administrative action to initiate retirement grade proceedings to demote Kelly from a retired Navy captain to a lower rank, with a corresponding deduction in pay. Hegseth also announced a formal letter of censure, outlining Kelly’s “reckless misconduct.”

“Six weeks ago, Senator Mark Kelly — and five other members of Congress — released a reckless and seditious video that was clearly intended to undermine good order and military discipline. As a retired Navy Captain who is still receiving a military pension, Captain Kelly knows he is still accountable to military justice,” Hegseth wrote in a Monday morning X post.

“Therefore, in response to Senator Mark Kelly’s seditious statements — and his pattern of reckless misconduct — the Department of War is taking administrative action against Captain Mark E. Kelly, USN (Ret),” the War Secretary added. “The department has initiated retirement grade determination proceedings under 10 U.S.C. § 1370(f), with reduction in his retired grade resulting in a corresponding reduction in retired pay.”

“Captain Kelly’s status as a sitting United States Senator does not exempt him from accountability, and further violations could result in further action,” Hegseth’s statement added.

Kelly responded to the Pentagon’s move in a statement later Monday, saying there’s nothing “more un-American” than the message he says Hegseth is trying to send by the move to demote him.

“Pete Hegseth wants to send the message to every single retired servicemember that if they say something he or Donald Trump doesn’t like, they will come after them the same way. It’s outrageous and it is wrong,” Kelly wrote in the statement.

“If Pete Hegseth, the most unqualified Secretary of Defense in our country’s history, thinks he can intimidate me with a censure or threats to demote me or prosecute me, he still doesn’t get it,” the Arizona Democrat added. “I will fight this with everything I’ve got — not for myself, but to send a message back that Pete Hegseth and Donald Trump don’t get to decide what Americans in this country get to say about their government.”

Five other Democrats appeared in the Nov. 18 video which President Donald Trump blasted as “seditious.” Kelly’s upper chamber colleague, Michigan Sen. Elissa Slotkin, a former intelligence officer, was the only other senator to participate in the video. Slotkin in December 2025 moved to create her own legal defense fund while the FBI pursues an inquiry into the six total Democratic lawmakers.

House Reps. Jason Crow of Colorado, Chris Deluzio of Pennsylvania, Maggie Goodlander of New Hampshire and Chrissy Houlahan of Pennsylvania, who are all military veterans, were also in the video.}}

STEPPING THINGS UP & US Warning to iran; Ocean Park-WA

June 21st: It rained all night - and all day, here in Ocean Park-WA

I woke up listening to the raindrops tap-dancing across the roof overhead … and decided to make a quick stew for Supper 👍

So, while my chosen flavor of coffee dripped into my coffee mug, I gathered all the ingredients I would need, and prepared them ahead of time to cut down on standing in the kitchen around Supper time:

Ingredients for my version of Fireside Stew made with 4Patriots dry mix …

I also bounced a thought back and forth in my head. I have been focusing on the negative aspect of Holland's preference to "just be friends" in this weird marriage … he does have TBI combined with PTSD - and I do have PTSD: communication & reception can often suffer sporadic static.

I've been [taking space] after the last sporadic static; and he's been making moves to "make things right" by initiating short dating episodes. At first I was angrily annoyed. Then, I thawed some - after all, we do miss each other's company. Maybe it will be fun dating my husband 😉 - perhaps the faults he has as a husband will shine as virtues in a boyfriend 😂🤣

What Are the 40 Virtues? (Full List): https://www.familiesofcharacter.com/blogs/virtue/what-are-the-40-virtues-full-list

Kenny Loggins - "Meet Me Halfway" Lyrics: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBWSwO91hdQ)

As a friend, we are best friends despite the marriage static. As a boyfriend, he was calm and relaxed. As a husband he put himself under enormous pressure … the fallout from his familial dysfunction was always in high gear. Yes - maybe reverting back to Friend & Boyfriend status for the time being will actually be best for both of us, until he feels comfortable and confident enough to step things up to Husband status without feeling like he's straining against a choke collar.

Tim McGraw - 'My Best Friend' Lyrics: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRJ0lpu6XaU)

He is wanting to do more Road Gypsy adventuring with me; and he really is the best person for me to adventure with - even when I'm distancing from him for peace's sake … he is diligently searching the internet for interesting places to stake our pegs and explore, making sure I have a hiking trail to walk. He's even talking about getting another dog to keep me company (really for his peace of mind while I'm out and about in the wilds, on my own) - a dog that will have a calmer personality than Bleu did: we loved having Bleu, but he tore Holland's arms and feet up something terrible with his toenails; toenails he wouldn't let anyone close to with clippers.

We will be enjoying more road trips.

We'll see about the dog …

We both have trust & abandonment issues that trip us up when stressors overwhelm our circuits. When life slides sideways & overwhelms, Holland gets domineering … and I get defiant: and the marriage gets sidetracked (distracted from the main purpose, or course; in essence, it gets delayed from what was originally intended).

We are actually both in the wrong.

When a Taurus bull & a Capricorn goat butt heads, love gets challenged.

But in the end, we both know neither of us are going anywhere. We are 2 best friends that love each other - and are caught in a whirlwind moment that feels overwhelmingly daunting, in the moment. We also know that these moments - intense as they can be - are fleeting, and not as frequent as they may feel when we are caught [in the moment]. Holland's stress overload cools quicker than mine; and he easily blows off the heated words. It takes me longer to cool down; and quite a while to forget the words and overlook the heat behind them.

I want to talk the issue out, to sort it out and lay it to rest: he does not. He refers to let things ride until they coast to a slow and easy stop by themselves - I want to talk it out, and apply the brakes as soon as possible to avoid further pitfalls: letting things ride only prolongs the heat instead of turning it off. MPO

However, I do understand that defusing the heat before talking, touching, or enjoying a drive together is the way he tamps down his trigger points. I am learning that when he says, "We need time apart! You're impossible!" - he isn't leaving permanently, he's just going for a cool down drive; and by "impossible", he means he isn't getting his way in that particular moment. Because of his TBI, the angry words and domineering behavior is loud and intense … but so is the flipside of that: he's ready to make up, forget the anger, and move forward as soon as the blue smoke clears. He's confused as to why I am stalling his "good intentions".

But he is beginning to understand that my need to initiate an immediate talk session during - or following - a heated back and forth word war, is my way seeking assurances that our unity is not seriously broken. When I say, "don't touch me" after a particularly ugly heated battle of the wills, I'm not pushing him away indefinitely … I just need space to bury the hurt feelings & soothe my soul. I don't want to be touched in the moment - I do not want to be placated. I don't want my feelings to be manipulated: I want to be heard. I want to be respected. I'm going to need time before I get friendly again.

This will all eventually be worked out peacefully; we are, after all, still newlyweds. We are still in the finding out about each other phase of marriage. Marriage is a new experience for Holland.

We are both damaged souls from serious traumas throughout our separate lives. We have differing views on just bout everything - and that is the complication driving everything 😟

We both know why we react the way we do … and we both look towards the Day we will understand what trips each other's triggers, so we can be wiser in how we react when life overwhelms our circuits.

We are both survivors - we know how to adjust and get what we want out of Life.

We actually do have more good times than we have challenging times.

Maybe it will be fun dating my husband; the dating period between that first coffee date, and the marriage trip to Reno-NV was very brief. We wouldn't be the 1st married couple that needs a "getting to know you" introduction period of after-the-fact-dating 😉

"Stepping things up" in this realm of Life, could be a very pleasant undertaking that leads to a peaceful, happy, domesticity 🙏🩹💘🕊️👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨

As I set the soup pot on the hot plate, I received a text from a friend:

"The Last Rapture Sign Just Appeared" – John MacArthur THE BEST MOTIVATIONAL SPEECH: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gS3V0qc5wpU)

I listened to the video while Supper simmered, and my hands kept the yarn moving smoothly along the WIP I hope to have done, soon …

Stew simmering, & working on my WIP to the backbeat of raindrops tap-dancing across Independence's roof.

Husband says, 'it's a repeat' ;-)

VAL'S UPGRADED 4PATRIOTS FIRESIDE STEW Recipe; Ocean Park-WA: (https://roadgypsiesvalandholland.blogspot.com/2025/06/vals-upgraded-4patriots-fireside-stew.html)

Then, following Supper, I received another text - it appears there is a "stepping up" happening in another realm of Life, also:

News Report on US Strike on iranian Nuclear Sites follows at end of this Posting …

And I closed this "stepping up" Shabbat, with a peaceful turning of the calendar page; with a prayer for peace, and a hope for substantial stability concerning all angles and levels of my Life 👊

*************************

‘Totally Obliterated’: Read Trump’s Remarks After US Strikes Iran Nuclear Sites

~The Sacramento Bee Updated June 21, 2025 8:01 PM

The text of President Donald Trump’s address Saturday, June 21, 2025, from the East Room of the White House following the announcement of a U.S. bomber strike on three nuclear sites in Iran: 

{{“A short time ago, the U.S. military carried out massive precision strikes on the three key nuclear facilities in the Iranian regime: Fordow, Natanz, and Esfahan. Everybody heard those names for years as they built this horribly destructive enterprise.

“Our objective was the destruction of Iran’s nuclear enrichment capacity and a stop to the nuclear threat posed by the world’s number one state sponsor of terror.

Tonight, I can report to the world that the strikes were a spectacular military success. Iran’s key nuclear enrichment facilities have been completely and totally obliterated. Iran, the bully of the Middle East, must now make peace. If they do not, future attacks will be far greater and a lot easier.

For 40 years, Iran has been saying, ‘Death to America,’ ‘Death to Israel.’ They have been killing our people, blowing off their arms, blowing off their legs with roadside bombs. That was their specialty. We lost over a thousand people. And hundreds of thousands throughout the Middle East and around the world have died as a direct result of their hate. In particular, so many were killed by their general, Qasem Soleimani.

I decided a long time ago that I would not let this happen. It will not continue.

I want to thank and congratulate Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu. We worked as a team like perhaps no team has ever worked before. And we’ve gone a long way to erasing this horrible threat to Israel. I want to thank the Israeli military for the wonderful job they’ve done.

And most importantly, I want to congratulate the great American patriots who flew those magnificent machines tonight and all of the United States military on an operation the likes of which the world has not seen in many, many decades. Hopefully, we will no longer need their services in this capacity. I hope that’s so. I hope.

I also want to congratulate the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, General Dan ‘Razin’ Caine. Spectacular general. And all of the brilliant military minds involved in this attack.

With all of that being said, this cannot continue. There will be either peace or there will be tragedy for Iran far greater than we have witnessed over the last eight days. Remember, there are many targets left. Tonight’s was the most difficult of them all by far, and perhaps the most lethal.

But if peace does not come quickly, we will go after those other targets with precision, speed and skill. Most of them can be taken out in a matter of minutes. There’s no military in the world that could have done what we did tonight. Not even close. There has never been a military that could do what took place just a little while ago.

Tomorrow, General Caine (and) Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth will have a press conference at 8 a.m. at the Pentagon.

And I want to just thank everybody and in particular, God. I want to just say, we love you, God, and we love our great military. Protect them.

God bless the Middle East, God bless Israel, and God bless America.

Thank you very much. Thank you.”}}

~This story was originally published June 21, 2025 at 7:25 PM.

SELF CARE SHABBAT; Ocean Park-WA

I'm planting my own tree.

I'm building a boat in dry sand.

Colton Dixon - 2022 'Build a Boat' with lyrics: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ky3-duE7d4)

I'm a woman of action; sitting on my duff is not for me.

It is true that my tribe is very small … and my intimate inner circle is even smaller, but that is because I prefer trustworthy friends - hanging back and cultivating solitude when necessary doesn't send me into a tailspin.

At this point, the only being in my Life is God - and that's okay: Elohim - The Father loves & provides for me … even dispatching angels to guard me in every place & all circumstances; Yeshua is the Husband I can depend on - the Lover of my soul, my reliable Confidant, closest Companion, and Healer of whatever assails me; The Ruach HaKo'desh is my Comforter - Who leads me to steams of smooth flowing peace.

And I'm okay with that.

Last night, while Holland was sleeping, I was quietly busy with several things … Holland has trouble sleeping through the night, so when he does actually give in to sleep, I do things quietly so his body get the healing sleep it needs to function well … one of the things I did, was toning exercises. They can be spaced out to complete the sets - which is how I did them:

I went to bed around 6 AM, after he got up.

I woke up at 1'noon, and as soon as the heat started … I got dressed and went for a walk. I am not going to keep rehashing things that are never going to change.

A change of environment was called for - and I heeded the call.

I walked up the street and around 2 blocks.

It was a pleasant day for a walk about.

The area walked, was on relatively flat terrain.

I crossed Bay Avenue twice: once at Oakie's Grocery Store, turning at the first right a block down - and again turning right behind Jack's Grocery Store … where I crossed the crosswalk to circle around behind 262nd PL past the Fire Department, turning right at the end of the block; that led me back to Bay Avenue, which would lead me back home.

It felt good to be outside. In fresh air. Listening to birdsong, enjoying soft earthy scents on the breeze, liking the little surprises of color along the route, and smiling with every gentle reminder of unconditional love Elohim caught my attention with:

Little pink wild roses; petals so delicate, they look like they are made from fine textured paper.

A relaxed deer …

Douglas spirea; bloom period from June to September.

Honeysuckle in full bloom; I had a honeysuckle vine at one of my past homes.

It's a lovely day to enjoy a walk-about.

Foxglove & Calla Lilies - I used to have these flowers in my flowerbeds.

California Poppies.

Foxgloves & Shasta Daisies & Tiger Lilies; I do miss the  flowerbeds I had.

I enjoy hearing birds chatter, tweet, & sing when I'm out and about.

My walk-about route today: a circulous 2 block radius - along both sides of Bay Avenue; Ocean Park-WA

Flag (Old Glory) Bunting on all of this building's windows~Medical Center-Pharmacy; Ocean Park-WA

Bright, colorful eye-catchers.

A fading yellow rose bush determined to survive & thrive among storm damage fallout - also a timely message.

The Calla Lily scent wafting on the gentle breeze had me missing things I hadn't thought about in 2 years.

5 minutes from home, I carefully watched a busy bee (winged death to me) on a dandelion head …

River Oats - I like these.

River Oats: A Native Grass: 

(https://piedmontgardener.com/2014/07/23/river-oats-a-native-grass-worth-adding-to-your-landscape/)

Walking down the gravel road past the Park Manager's house, I couldn't resist reaching out to touch the Monkey Puzzle Tree's spiraling, spiny spikes. They are very sharp, thick and stiffly solid; like a plastic bin.

Monkey Puzzle Tree limbs, hanging over Park  Manager's fencing.

Monkey puzzle trees (also known as Chilean pine trees) are unusual-looking and long-lived conifers, with lifespans sometimes exceeding 1,000 years. Monkey puzzle trees are relatively slow-growing trees, especially in their early lives -  for the first 5 to 10 years of their growth, they stay pretty much grass level … but once they rise above the grass level, they tend to grow at a rate of about 14 inches per year. This monkey puzzle tree is very tall and very wide: it has been here in this location for a very long time.

My impulsive moment past, I continued on towards Independence.

I was feeling good about my walkabout results.

I was feeling grateful and thankful that my lungs behaved, and did not give me a single second of concern during the entire time from start to finish.

Curiosity satiated, I took my tail home.

I did pretty good today.

I had just crossed the threshold of home, when I got a good news text … God is good all the time, and all the time God is good.