TILLAMOOK-OR (Pt. 2)/Shabbat~Self-Care

August 29th: Leaves are turning.

So are the wheels of Life unfolding.

Trying new things while remembering past things is okay.

And we need to DO new things in the Present – we can’t keep living in the Past.

Holland's entire Life has been lived jockeying between relatives (homes, jobs, visitations) - and dwelling on Past experiences (musing about those experiences at home; or rehashing them over Kelso kitchen table coffee chats). Courting, dwelling, & focusing 95% of attention to the Past, is not healthy; that activity actually stymies growth & throws shade over outlook on life in general. MPO

I do touch base with relatives and friends … but I live my Life in the Now. I do, on occasion, revisit memories, but on the whole - I incorporate new experiences, new people, and making new memories into my Life. I balance my Life with keeping the Past & the Present in their own lanes, to make room for the Future (though that is flexible because a future is never guaranteed).

And  sometimes … the Past crowds the present without our permission.

Like Last night: a bad memory tripped by Scott's death (and all the dramatizing fallout) was interfering with my sleep. I was debating getting up and drinking some cocoa in hopes of enticing the Sandman - when tears came unbidden. Unwelcome. They do not belong in my New Life. My New Life has enough hurdles to jump, without juggling painful & heart-wrenching old memories I thought had been laid to rest. Holland shifted, and asked, "Are you okay, Baby?" I sniffled and said, "Yeah. Just a bad memory." He reached an arm over and pulled me to him. He didn't ask. I didn't reveal. His shoulder got soaked; and in that moment … he was the gentle, empathetic friend, my heart fell in love with.

He really is a good, kind man, when he's not fighting against the tender side of himself.

Juice Newton - 'The Sweetest Thing' Lyrics: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EScsvMU-wmY&list=RDEScsvMU-wmY&start_radio=1)

When we woke up this morning, we drank our morning coffees, then hopped into Betsy to do some backtracking explorations. We didn't have time - nor were there big enough spaces along the route to pull over, when we drove the coastline to Tillamook yesterday; so, today, we set out to explore the places we couldn't explore yesterday when Betsy was tethered to Independence … and Holland focused on the Present with an eye towards the Future.

I was thankful the Past was getting a rest: from both of us.

Today's Plan …

We drove first into Tillamook - there were several things we wanted to visit. Straight off, we drove to the Tillamook Air Museum … and it was too massive to fit the picture taking frame, so Holland drove down a side road - and I snagged a few pictures from the paved roadway, there.

Tillamook Air Museum-OR

Holland tells me these pillars are 'Blimp Supports' to cradle the flying behemoth when it's parked here.

A few  minutes later, as we passed through downtown Tillamook; Holland obliged me by turning off onto a backstreet to check out 2 buildings that caught my attention.

The steeple of this building caught my eye as we drove by.

Community Church; Tillamook-OR

Then, we drove to the Tillamook Cheese Factory … but that was quickly scrapped when Holland said he doubted he could walk the walk even with the cane (the building is huge, and we'd have to park a half a mile away, in the designated parking lot); he'd sit in Betsy and wait for me. I said I wouldn't want to do it without him. It was a nice thought, but I really wasn't that interested (my body is lactose intolerant & I'm pretty sure the restaurant there would be filled with cheesy, creamy, milk-based foods: it's a dairy operation, after all; they will be selling their product), and I'd be perfectly happy with drive by adventures that we could experience together - things off the tourist radar. I'm kinda weird that way. Normal touristy draws do not interest me - I would much rather scout out low-key things that pique my real curiosity.

So, that's what we did 😊👌

Along the way I saw an A-frame house, and commented on it - which led to me learning more about my husband 👍 Holland said, "That A-frame in Lexington-WA … my grandpa and father built that." I said, "No way!" He said, "Yeah. Way. In fact my family built all the houses in that tract of housing." I said, "Wow. I've hiked past that A-frame for decades, when I walked the dike behind it. Bob and I knew the people that bought that A-frame. Wow." It's freaky when I think of all the times Holland's, and my, paths have crossed … and it is confusing to me, thinking that now - since out paths have converged and formed a straight line, it's a real struggle to keep this marriage on an even keel 💕😳🙏

But it was fun to listen to him talk about those days of his early life in Cowlitz County-WA … the community growth; the river life back then, compared to now; the dike that wasn't there before Mt. St. Helen's blew her top; the Allen Street Draw-bridge we both remembered crossing, before it was replaced; the little Lexington church we both attended - and did not notice each other (we were both married to our 1st spouses, then); the houses we both lived in, on Nevada Drive, literally a block from each other - and did not notice one another; ect. It was an interesting conversation.

I was also noticing that most of the buildings was highlighting a patchwork quilt design, on them - and then I noticed a sign mentioning a local quilting & textile center: then, the blocks of quilt patterns decorating various buildings, made sense 👌

Latimier Quilting & Textile Center; Tillamook-OR: https://www.orartswatch.org/latimer-quilt-textile-center-a-little-known-hive-of-fiber-arts-activity-near-tillamook/

And, on our return drive back towards the RV Park, Holland & I simultaneously noticed that what was previously thought to be a train trestle bridge cover … was instead, a breezeway over the highway, by which people could access the beach on one side - and housing complexes on the other.

An over-road-breezeway; Tillamook-OR

When Holland was explaining it to me, it made sense: I never would have considered that reasoning. But he did, because he was born in a beach-theme town, lived-worked-& generally fooled around in beach-themed towns; he knew what it was used for. That thing has had me stumped, and AI is clueless, but the way Holland explained it to me makes sense.

Then we stopped at a Taco Wagon in Rockaway Beach-OR, and bought a tasty lunch combo. So good! The short-grain-rice tasted like Basmati Rice, but I know Basmati Rice (it's my favorite cooking rice), and this rice wasn't Basmati. The food was wonderful and the people serving it was friendly & courteous. I even thought the price was okay - this was definitely worth stopping for. We highly recommend this Taco Wagon 👍

While waiting for our food order, a stranger struck up a convo with me - and Holland realized that I don't "hate everyone!": I'm actually quite chatty and relaxed 😉 when I feel [safe] around certain people; even strange men who send off calm and peaceful vibes ✌️ Holland was amazed to see the [old] me in a social situation 😊

Lunch break; Rockaway Beach-OR.Rockaway Beach-OR:  (https://tillamookcoast.com/where-to-go/rockaway-beach/)

SO good! The enchilada's were solidly stuffed with pulled beef & the rice was deliciously flavored & scented.

I could be that relaxed and talkative around his family and friends too, if they would behave. But they don't - so, I'm not. Ditto for my husband, too: if he would relax in this married relationship, he'd find me more relaxed, too.

And the Past memories that squeeze my heart & bring tears to my eyes wouldn't be triggered, either. They only encroach on my New Life when chaotic turmoil is dragged into it - and all those painful memories that ride the turbulent winds of uncertainty, spring with a vengeance 😔💔😪

Anyway.

We spotted another old steam engine … so, we turned down the driveway to to check it out:

Steam Engine #90 is a historic 90-ton steam locomotive in Tillamook, Oregon, undergoing restoration by the Oregon Coast Scenic Railroad (OCSR). Engine #90 was originally built for the Polson Logging Company. After Polson was purchased by Rayonier Inc. in 1948, the locomotive was also operated by Rayonier.

Back on the main highway, Holland said we'll drive down to Newport-OR, then cut over Hwy #20 (the longest highway in the USA) to I-5 in Corvallis-OR, then to Eugene-OR where if here is no wildfire smoke in the air, we can hunker down overnight; before driving on to Coalinga-CA where a spot has been secured to park Independence through November - Holland's Colorado cousin will be in that region with is bees, and we are hoping for a hook-up then. Where we end up after that, is in Elohim's hands; we're running out of options with warm climate States.

Holland just informed me that we will be pulling stakes here, tomorrow …

Back home, I walked around the Park - enjoying self time with the Almighty. Opening my senses to Yeshua's creation (this is a country lot Park; there are trees, lots of grassy areas, a river along the back end). Occasionally meeting new people - striking up a short convo, or nodding in passing (2 people were walking dogs - hello's were exchanged in passing's); and found that the Park walk was smaller than anticipated. I thought a mile walk … it was 'just' under half a mile.

A couple cabins for rent …

Bob & I knew the Ferrell heir, in Raymond-WA. We met him in Fellowship, there.

The Park waterwheel feature.

This is a mobile home park model - not an RV.

And there WE are - 2 streets over.

My walk results …

And I laughed when I lit a scent candle next to the potted plant sitting on the kitchen counter: I had come home from our shopping in Tillamook with some groceries & a pretty ivy plant … but we could not find Tillamook Cheese of any kind in Tillamook! There were other brands - but none of them were stamped with the Tillamook brand 🧐 So, I guess the only place to buy Tillamook Cheese in Tillamook, is at the Cheese Factory 😕

The pretty Ivy I bought grocery shopping in Tillamook-WA

Tomorrow, we pull stakes here; so, tonight, I'm going to ease into the intentional space of Shabbat through some preparatory 'moving teardowns' before sundown, and doing a little self-care ✨🌹 before my eyes close in slumber 🛌😴

=August 31, 2025 - TILLAMOOK-OR; Pt. #1: (https://roadgypsiesvalandholland.blogspot.com/2025/08/tillamook-or-pt-1.html)

=September 1, 2025 - TILLAMOOK-OR (Pt. 2)/Shabbat~Self-Care: (https://roadgypsiesvalandholland.blogspot.com/2025/09/tillamook-or-pt-2shabbatself-care.html)

SELF CARE SHABBAT; Ocean Park-WA

I'm planting my own tree.

I'm building a boat in dry sand.

Colton Dixon - 2022 'Build a Boat' with lyrics: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ky3-duE7d4)

I'm a woman of action; sitting on my duff is not for me.

It is true that my tribe is very small … and my intimate inner circle is even smaller, but that is because I prefer trustworthy friends - hanging back and cultivating solitude when necessary doesn't send me into a tailspin.

At this point, the only being in my Life is God - and that's okay: Elohim - The Father loves & provides for me … even dispatching angels to guard me in every place & all circumstances; Yeshua is the Husband I can depend on - the Lover of my soul, my reliable Confidant, closest Companion, and Healer of whatever assails me; The Ruach HaKo'desh is my Comforter - Who leads me to steams of smooth flowing peace.

And I'm okay with that.

Last night, while Holland was sleeping, I was quietly busy with several things … Holland has trouble sleeping through the night, so when he does actually give in to sleep, I do things quietly so his body get the healing sleep it needs to function well … one of the things I did, was toning exercises. They can be spaced out to complete the sets - which is how I did them:

I went to bed around 6 AM, after he got up.

I woke up at 1'noon, and as soon as the heat started … I got dressed and went for a walk. I am not going to keep rehashing things that are never going to change.

A change of environment was called for - and I heeded the call.

I walked up the street and around 2 blocks.

It was a pleasant day for a walk about.

The area walked, was on relatively flat terrain.

I crossed Bay Avenue twice: once at Oakie's Grocery Store, turning at the first right a block down - and again turning right behind Jack's Grocery Store … where I crossed the crosswalk to circle around behind 262nd PL past the Fire Department, turning right at the end of the block; that led me back to Bay Avenue, which would lead me back home.

It felt good to be outside. In fresh air. Listening to birdsong, enjoying soft earthy scents on the breeze, liking the little surprises of color along the route, and smiling with every gentle reminder of unconditional love Elohim caught my attention with:

Little pink wild roses; petals so delicate, they look like they are made from fine textured paper.

A relaxed deer …

Douglas spirea; bloom period from June to September.

Honeysuckle in full bloom; I had a honeysuckle vine at one of my past homes.

It's a lovely day to enjoy a walk-about.

Foxglove & Calla Lilies - I used to have these flowers in my flowerbeds.

California Poppies.

Foxgloves & Shasta Daisies & Tiger Lilies; I do miss the  flowerbeds I had.

I enjoy hearing birds chatter, tweet, & sing when I'm out and about.

My walk-about route today: a circulous 2 block radius - along both sides of Bay Avenue; Ocean Park-WA

Flag (Old Glory) Bunting on all of this building's windows~Medical Center-Pharmacy; Ocean Park-WA

Bright, colorful eye-catchers.

A fading yellow rose bush determined to survive & thrive among storm damage fallout - also a timely message.

The Calla Lily scent wafting on the gentle breeze had me missing things I hadn't thought about in 2 years.

5 minutes from home, I carefully watched a busy bee (winged death to me) on a dandelion head …

River Oats - I like these.

River Oats: A Native Grass: 

(https://piedmontgardener.com/2014/07/23/river-oats-a-native-grass-worth-adding-to-your-landscape/)

Walking down the gravel road past the Park Manager's house, I couldn't resist reaching out to touch the Monkey Puzzle Tree's spiraling, spiny spikes. They are very sharp, thick and stiffly solid; like a plastic bin.

Monkey Puzzle Tree limbs, hanging over Park  Manager's fencing.

Monkey puzzle trees (also known as Chilean pine trees) are unusual-looking and long-lived conifers, with lifespans sometimes exceeding 1,000 years. Monkey puzzle trees are relatively slow-growing trees, especially in their early lives -  for the first 5 to 10 years of their growth, they stay pretty much grass level … but once they rise above the grass level, they tend to grow at a rate of about 14 inches per year. This monkey puzzle tree is very tall and very wide: it has been here in this location for a very long time.

My impulsive moment past, I continued on towards Independence.

I was feeling good about my walkabout results.

I was feeling grateful and thankful that my lungs behaved, and did not give me a single second of concern during the entire time from start to finish.

Curiosity satiated, I took my tail home.

I did pretty good today.

I had just crossed the threshold of home, when I got a good news text … God is good all the time, and all the time God is good.