STAYIN' ALIVE~Self-Care; Castle Rock-WA

June 15th: Woke up.

Still kickin'

And I'm not the only one trying to stay alive - visiting my Blog Hop Friends this afternoon, this posting from Colorado, caught my attention:

Pat @ https://millefiorifavoriti.blogspot.com/ posted - "Twin Deer Fawns Were Born in My Yard Last Week!"

(https://millefiorifavoriti.blogspot.com/2026/06/twin-deer-fawns-were-born-in-my-yard.html)

As well as these posts of mine, that were highlighted on 2 Blogger Friends' Blogs: 

Barb's Blog @ https://frenchethereal.net/ 

highlighted my personal, & encouraging, post 

(https://roadgypsiesvalandholland.blogspot.com/2026/06/hope-for-brokenhearted-castle-rock-wa.html)

Linda's Blog @ https://www.lifeandlinda.com/ 

highlighted my crochet Flag Pot Cover 

(https://roadgypsiesvalandholland.blogspot.com/2026/06/mod-grand-old-flag-freedom-250-plant.html)

Workouts were low-key, today: I did some finger & foot stretches.

The fingers are all tendons so training them to be strong and supple requires constant work.

Tendons Worked~Hands

The benefits are fewer injuries, less strain from repetitive work plus supple hands that can be used to do almost anything~Aim for 10 ct. EA set x 3~x3 to x5 = week

There are ten tendon and ligament groups at work in your foot, toes and ankles - and training them allows your body to conserve energy with every step you take, which means that everything is affected from your balance when standing upright, to posture, walking, running and jumping.

Tendons Worked~Feet

Healthy feet not only make us feel better but also help with improved circulation and an improved feeling of relaxation when we force our bodies to work hard, physically. Footwork is one of those workouts you could do when watching TV, & your feet (and the rest of your body) will thank you for it~Aim for 30 ct x10 EA set~x2 to 3 = week

DIY Chef's Salad that came together quickly & was perfect for today's weather.

This small bit of activity, was all the energy I spared today: it was very hot, and my physical battery is running low.

OUCH! SWOLLEN ANKLE

July 11th: Last evening, as we were going for a drive - I felt a sharp nip on the side of my left foot: some insect had nipped me. I didn't see what it was. It didn't feel like a bee sting. There was no uncomfortable feeling, other than that one quick sharp nip. I let out an "Ouch! something just bit me", and didn't think anything of it.

There was no reason to be concerned during the entire drive: probably about an hour loop drive.

We'd been back from the drive about 7 hours, when I noticed my left ankle and foot was swollen; it wasn't painful - the skin in just a little tight with the swelling. Holland had been snoring softly for about an hour, and I did not want to wake him up; he doesn't get enough sleep as it is … and I really do not want to be sitting in a glaring bright hospital waiting room waiting indefinitely to be seen.

My left foot, ankle, and calf are swollen.

Can't even see the ankle bone & sandals are biting into top of foot.

So, I've swallowed a Benadryl capsule, monitored my heart rate (which was slightly elevated, but not alarming), elevated my left foot while listening to music & reading a bit more of the novel I started a couple days ago. There is a little numb tingling in the back of my throat - but no throat or tongue swelling. I was a little bit nauseous, and I was pretty sure this was an anaphylaxis onset, BUT my body didn't appear to be in immediate danger yet.

I asked my FB Friends for prayer.

Around 3 AM, I was still "hanging in there" … so, I went to bed - sending an S.O.S. heavenward & elevated my foot with a spare pillow. At this point, I figured I'd see dawn laying beside my husband, or in Heaven.

Anaphylaxis and Allergies:

https://www.webmd.com/allergies/anaphylaxis & https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anaphylaxis/symptoms-causes/syc-20351468

By the grace of Elohim, I woke up this morning, beside Holland; but I didn't feel well … and my ankle was still swollen - as well as my leg up to my hip; and I had an itchy rash on the top of my feet as well as front and back of my calves: I woke Holland up and said, "I think we need to go to the hospital in Salmon Creek."

Holland was instantly awake and focused.

I couldn't pull my jeans on, so I went in my p.j.'s.

The Benadryl had stabilized the anaphylaxis symptoms … and I was still present on Earth, so my next thought was 'this swelling is an allergic reaction to something I ate' between the time we got back from the previous evening's drive - and when Holland went to bed around 10 PM.

I started counting off the things I had eaten: a cup of instant Hills Bros. English Toffee Cappuccino; a Hormel Spaghetti & Sauce Microwave Supper; a couple handful Mixed Nuts; a few Jelly Beans; half a bottle of Coca Cola. Nothing out of he ordinary. It was mystifying.

The foot and leg numbness I know is related to a pinched nerve in the piriformis muscle - but it's not backing off. Usually I need a couple tabs of prednisone muscle relaxer & a cortisone shot. Last time I had seen a doctor about this situation (a couple of years ago; I really avoid medical facilities & doctors), he said, "You have to learn to live with it, it doesn't get better. Eventually you will have to consider a shot directly into your back … and possibly surgery." None of those options are good ones.

Holland drove me to Salmon Creek this afternoon; hopefully this thing will get sorted out.

So, we drove up the freeway to Salmon Creek, pretty much in silence.

Legacy Salmon Creek Medical Center-WA from Woodland-WA; 15 min (14.5 mi) via I-5 S

Legacy Salmon Creek Medical Center; #2211 NE 139th St., Vancouver-WA

The ER waiting room was packed: I signed in, and encouraged Holland to wait for me in Betsy - which would be the most comfortable place for him: we both knew the waiting, and the exam would stretch into hours by the look of the waiting people packed into the waiting room like sardines.

I was seen relatively quickly - a welcome surprise.

A battery of tests was set in motion … including one I never considered.

Texts back and forth while I waited; Holland had engaged a Prayer Team.

However, the exams were moving along at a snail's pace. And I didn't like that my swollen ankle, & leg rash, was taking 2nd place to my age: e.v.e.r.s.i.n.g.l.e.t.e.s.t. was geared towards a geriatric screening - 3 nurses, a doctor, 4 medical info collectors, 2 technicians, & 1 ER staff person moved in and out of the room; and when the doctor did pop in for a brief second, he totally ignored why I had come to be examined.

Not okay with me.

Doc came in to check my foot and legs … and claimed he 'didn't see any rash'; he must be blind: bright red pin-dot rash covered both shin-calves. Very obvious to the naked eye.

Apparently NO ONE CAN SEE swelling in my ankle - all they can see is B.S. age-related-$$$$$ floating before their greedy eyes.

After the first hour, I was starting to get seriously frustrated with having my concerns blown off. I was tired of being treated like I had no say whatsoever in what transpired with my body.

I was asked to follow a finger with my eyes: it was a stupid child's game and had absolutely no relevance at all to my swollen ankle or rashed legs.

I was constantly asked what my name was - what day or year it was - what my BD was - ect.; again no relevance at all to the reason I was there.

I was asked if I was diabetic: I am not. Admittedly, I am fluffy, but I am not diabetic.

I had heart-monitoring stickies stuck to my chest … and then, asked if I wanted to consider a breast reduction, because, "you will certainly qualify." WTH Why would that person even feel it was her duty to bring that up? Why do doctors want to lop a natural woman's breasts off to "lighten the load" - and then plant gigantic unrealistic breast implants in a man's chest so he 'feels like a woman'?

By the time I was wheeled back to my room following the unwanted saline injection that shot through me like liquid fire, for the {necessary} CT (how is that related to a swollen ankle?) … and pretty forcefully (not physical, but a very firm and frustrated 'No') shooed the MRI attendant out of my room ("No: I do not want to be medicated and shuttled through the tube - I don't do drugs for any reason, and I do not like to be hemmed in by anything. No") … I just wanted to be out of that money-grabbing, tone-deaf hellhole.

More texting while the waiting stretched on and on and on …

Nonsense tests and a hyped-up scare tactic - no interest at all from the medical team concerning WHAT I came in here for! I'm ready to leave and cast the dice in a power play of my own.

3 nurses, 1 doctor, 4 medical info collectors, 2 technicians, & 1 ER staff person came into the room … and no one was focused on why I had come in; they seemed more focused on racking up medical fees for nonsensical and unrelated "exams" :-(

Finally I made a choice that ended the nonsense: and the rapidly escalating medical bill … I pulled the hospital smock off and pulled my tee on. I walked out to the nurses station and asked, "Who do I talk to to get this thing out of my hand?" No one answered - I repeated the question. The head nurse said, "Dr. Johnson will right here to check on you …" I cut her off, and said, "Too little, too late. WHO do I talk to to get this thing out of my hand?" She said, "I don't feel comfortable doing that."

I pulled my phone out of my purse, punched Holland's phone # in, and when he answered, I asked: "I have this port in my hand; do you happen to know how to remove it?" He said he did - so I shut my phone down and started walking towards the lobby.

Immediately the head nurse who had been sitting on her ass, filing her nail, sprung up and shouted, "You can't leave!" I kept walking, and said, "Watch me." An orderly said, "I can take that out for you." So, I let him … and watched the head nurse do a slow burn as I pivoted, and I walked out.

I'm furious. I will be billed thousands of dollars for non-stop nonsense; NOT HAPPY.

This is WHY I  have nothing good to say about the medical field. Total waste.

As soon as I hopped into Betsy, I said, "Now, do you understand why I avoid the medical zoo atmosphere? I don't care how sick I am or how much pain I am in - I never want to be in another hospital as long as I live: I only came today because you make such a big deal out of it … for me, I prefer to wait things out and rely on Elohim to come through for me. I want you to honor me on this issue."

I don't care if people think I'm a religious fanatic … as far as I am concerned, prayer works best because medical people will keep you a caged animal to be treated like a hostage guinea pig; trying their best to scare you into submission.

I don't like being caged.

I don't like being treated like a guinea pig.

I resent the employment of scare tactics.

I choose to rest on what I know best: the strength of prayer, and the power of Calvary.

And bless his heart, Holland is finally in agreement with me on this topic :-)

TRUSTING SHABBAT REST; Woodland-WA

I haven't posted anything since June 3rd, because everything in my life has gone sideways since then.

We had left the Long Beach-WA Peninsula the morning of May 30th, and secured an RV parking space at the Lewis River RV Park … where the present trouble started. Every time we get close to Kelso-WA, there is trouble: Holland's family and friends live in Kelso, and they are trouble (drinking, drugging, lying, cheating, and stealing: they are not nice people) - which causes trouble for us when Holland gets pulled (he doesn't have to be coaxed very hard) into the never-ending-chaos, and brings it home after his trips to Kelso.

So, now, I will be having nothing else to do with his family (friends were never an issue for me, as I never wanted to have anything to do with them -  having met 2 of them and being chauvinistically dressed down by the shrimpy mouthy one that struts around like a preening neanderthal). I will no longer be enjoying a glass of red wine during my 24-hour Shabbat Rest because having alcohol in the house only adds fuel to the Kelso flames Holland vigorously fans. I have made it clear to Holland that there will be no more narcotics brought into the house - Holland needs rehab to break his Vicodin addiction … but he stubbornly refuses, claiming he is not addicted, while exhibiting all the characteristics of an addict - including spending time with addicted family and friends when we are in WA State, near Kelso; he angrily refuses to go to rehab or marriage counseling because he knows that he will be told that he needs to enter rehab and cut ties with addict connections (meaning cutting ties with family members and "friends"). We don't even agree on faith … Holland was born into and raised with a cult mentality that eerily resembles the Jim Jones religious cult (I did not know this about him until after we got back from Reno-NV; he had been very quiet in local fellowship, and put himself forward as a Christian man). He knew I was a Messianic Jew when we married because I was very open about myself … now my being a Jew is intolerable to him, and he accuses me of being a seventh day adventist - which I am NOT; but in his mind I am, and that settles the argument for him. I am a Christian: a full-on born again Christian Jew (aka Messianic Jew), and I have agreed to go to a Sunday Service with him … there is an Assembly of God fellowship up the street here in Woodland, but he will only consider vineyard "churches" in Longview-WA or Rainier-OR; knowing I will never set foot in those cultic environments where heresies, blasphemies, and outright occult activities are practiced: these religious activities are what he is familiar with, and he's not interested in anything else.

Holland is not - nor are any members of his family - Christian though they can quote Scripture - chapter and verse: and are actively involved in church activities (aka good deeds = salvation) locally, and nation-wide (and his "friends" are loose bullets when it comes to religion; anything and everything goes); he doesn't know what to do with a wife who is 100% Christian in thought, act, and deed. It irritates him, so he starts arguments and shouts accusations; n.o.n.s.t.o.p.

So.

Independence was scheduled for a complete and thorough inspection, and we are holed up in a local motel; we will know something about the damages fallout the third or fourth week of this month. In the meantime, things between Holland and I have gone seriously sideways. As well as the possibility of Independence being totaled … it appears that our marriage is also headed for the scrap heap.

I can't believe I'm living a life that eerily resembles my mother's and my sister Ramona's. I have STUDIOUSLY AVOIDED domineering men. I always steered clear of neanderthal's. Holland needs to dominate; he needs to control everything and everyone. Holland was unprepared for me. I do NOT like to be under a man's thumb … and I will NEVER be controlled by a man. I will gladly walk alongside a full-grown man who understands that I am a capable and worthy partner; BUT I will NEVER choke on the dust of a chest-thumping/brow-beating, shouting Neanderthal.

If a man does not allow for disagreement, individual thought and opinions; and flat out tells you that you stress him out because you are not wanting to “fall in line” and be in solidarity with any activity you find objectionable and destructive = like drugs, and bad company … they are shallow people, wanting their own way; and wanting to mold you into their opinion of acceptability. They will never be satisfied – and there will never be enough that can be done to make you acceptable in their eyes.

As of 2 days ago, Holland shouted he wants a divorce because "we don't get along - you don't like my family or friends: you hate everyone!" I don't hate anyone. I don't want to be around - or to be associated with - drunks, druggies, liars, cheats, or thieves: if people are trying to better themselves, that's different … but when people refuse to change bad habits and criminal activity, then NO! That does not make me hateful, it makes me relying on common sense and self-care actions. I was raised in an alcoholic-druggie environment before I left home at 17 to build a life for myself away from that crazy train ride; I have no plans to book passage on the Redmill Religion Express Rail. Holland wants a divorce, but he refuses to give me one based on Biblical principles - and anything less is simply another domineering action to keep me from moving on. I am a Christian, a divorce for any other reason than adultery will keep me tethered to him in the eyes of God for the rest of my life with no hope of getting on with my Life. It is cruel; it is unjustified. But I am learning that cruelty is the hallmark of the Redmill Religion.

This entire relationship has been hard to live with; I've never experienced anything like it before - it's almost like he's bipolar. I never know from 1 hour to the next what mood he's going to exhibit. One minute he wants me to go visit his family with him … the next he's yelling at me that he doesn't want me to have anything to do with his family: one minute he's reaching across the console to hold my hand & the next minute he's yelling he wants a divorce because "I can't live with you - we don't get along." If we have a great day one day … he will turn the next day into a chaotic drama. It's like he deliberately sabotages any chance of this marriage surviving. It's a crazy train ride every day.

But, he wants to make sure I "get an apartment and a new car" before he ditches me so he doesn't have to deal with guilt of ditching me for the hyped up hogwash he sells to friends and family. In short, he is willing to throw away a good thing in his life in order to hold onto bad habits and bad company. Isn't he a swell guy?

This entire week has been a nightmare straight out of Hell - so these are some of the things I have been doing to keep a peaceful attitude, a joyous outlook on life, and cultivate love in my Life leading towards my Shabbat Island of Rest:

1. Spend time away (I've gone back to hiking, and visiting friends: gone many hours, which is a blessing at this time).

2. Be intentional (I intend to be happy no matter what, and I have set my mind on harvesting happiness where I can).

3. Schedule “rest” (I purposefully rein in angry thoughts, and focus my mind on canceling stress; I also have been sleeping more than usual so that my body can relax and heal from the stress wounds aimed at me).

4. Read the Bible (YES! The Word is a reliable and trustworthy antidote to everything the enemy of our souls can hurl at us).

5. Meditate on God’s Word (I was just saying this to a friend the other day … the Word is written on my heart that I may not sin or return tit-for-tat to those who have wronged me; I will not entertain hate. The Word is a soothing Balm and a source of soul healing).

6. Tune out the noise (Turn my eyes upon Yeshua, and trust Elohim's Plan; punch the mute button on angry words and respond only as Yeshua would in situations geared towards baiting).

7. Spend time in nature (hiking and days in the country are cheap and enjoyable  therapeutic activities).

8. Be in God’s presence (Walk in the fullness of a Christian Lifestyle every day, and earnestly pray God's Will in every situation).

9. Listen to praise music …

Michael Card - 'Joy In The Journey' lyrics: 

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4UqStPHbFIc)

Where we go from here, I do not know: but this I do know - Elohim has a definite Plan for my Life, and He brought me to Holland. I was not looking for a husband. I was not entertaining remarriage thoughts. Because of this fact, I am secure in whatever tomorrow holds. I know Who holds tomorrow :-)

LEWIS RIVER RV PARK; Woodland, WA

We were up early, and made our scheduled inspection appointment on time: the news was not good :-(

Mobile West RV Service; #1503 41 Pl, Seaview, WA 98644

Getting the verdict …

The conclusion was not good :-(

Another assessment & a Storage Unit = m.o.n.t.h.s. of twiddling our thumbs.

Holland said we'd need to find an RV Dealer between Longview & Vancouver willing to do the much needed inspection … and I pulled out my Tablet to do an internet search for RV Parks we could utilize for 2 weeks; time enough to get my eye exam (as stress-free as possible), and reschedule another inspection. An RV Park in Woodland-WA had a spot big enough for us, so we turned Betsy's nose in that direction.

Barely 10 minutes after we turned onto the Astoria-Megler Bridge, we missed being involved in a head-on collision when some crack-head speeding towards us in our lane (no sane person would have tried it!) decided to pass a loooong string of 20 cars … the driver barely had time to swerve into the correct lane directly in front of us - Holland was laying on Betsy's horn, and drivers in the on-coming lane had stopped forward movement, altogether; so as not to be sucked into the anticipated wreak. It was so close I don't know how the front bumpers missed contact.

Where do these brainless drivers come from? AND WHY do they always find us while doing their stupid (a lack of good judgment or intelligence and they are not at all sensible) deeds???

THANK YOU ELOHIM for the grace You provided this morning: there was no impact, and no lasting complications; You are a good God.

Woodland-WA from Ocean Park-WA; 1 hr 58 min (97.3 mi) via US-30 E

The Falvel Mansion dominates the scenery as one turns onto Main Street, in Astoria-OR; I have been inside that place (before show-biz tickets were required), and it is something to see ;-)

Flavel House Museum - #714 Exchange St, Astoria, OR 97103:  (https://astoriamuseums.org/explore/flavel-house-museum/ & https://oregon.com/attractions/flavel-house)

Flavel Family Background Info: 

(https://raisethestakeseditions.com/george-conrad-flavel-house/ & https://thatoregonlife.com/2017/10/flavel-house-astoria/)

Other than that heart gripping-adrenaline infusion, the drive to Woodland was relaxing and enjoyable. The chilly, wet, cloudy weather was left behind … and the warmth of sunny, blue-skied Spring weather enveloped us: it felt wonderful :-)

When we reached Woodland, we drove up the Old Lewis River Road (new experience for me; Holland fished this river) to reach our destination, and Holland did great in carefully jockeying Betsy back and forth in the tight area (walkie-talkie convo wasn't working, so I pitched mine in the open window and strolled around the grounds because I couldn't watch anymore - it was a very tight and stressful situation) to carefully back looong Independence into a shady, forested slot along the Lewis River in Woodland-WA

Once Independence was in place and set up, I started putting things in place inside, and Holland got the internet going … then we both took a nap to relax our tired bodies (didn't get much sleep last night = too much on our minds), and stressed minds (complex decisions, a near head-on collision, and a very tight parking slot).

Mt. St. Helens; Port of Longview-WA in forefront - crossing the Lewis & Clark Bridge from OR into WA

Port of Longview: 

(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Port_of_Longview)

Holland registering us …

Lewis River RV Park & Country Store;

#3125 Lewis River Rd, Woodland, WA 98674

Carefully tucked among the towering Firs …

My back steps are literally at the edge of the upper level bank; I will not be utilizing these.

The view of the Lewis River from our front door ;-)

Tomorrow, I think I will try to loosen up my left leg muscles with a walk around the Park: it will feel good to walk among the scentual barked giants, again ;-)

HOLIDAY SEASON ~ 2023

Today I took the packages I wrapped the other night, to the UPS Store.

13 minutes from our front door.

Alone.

On a city roadway - not a freeway, but wider than any 'regular road' I've ever driven. It was a little intimidating, but Elohim was faithful to infuse my spirit with "peace that passes all understanding" :-)

Holland would have joined me, but I need to know how to navigate these addresses on my own. I want him to know that when I strike out on my own (as I'll have to eventually - grocery shopping, clothes shopping, ect.), I'll get from A to B without getting lost.

So, Holland and Bleu stayed home … and I learned to blend with frog-hopping traffic, without suffering a migraine headache.

Going to the UPS Store today for shipping.

A 7-lane roadway … and I'm peaceful while driving it; Elohim really worked a miracle with me on this ;-)

I got a text from Pam showing me the tree she has this year, replacing the big one she usually puts up - and that text inspired me to design something for our Yuma Holiday Season~2023 :-)

Pam's tree.

Packages stamped and sent off, I drove home to pick Holland and Bleu up, for a trip to Wal*Mart; and as I drove I thought how comfortable I was driving this extra-large 'highway' in Yuma: I also thought of how comfortable I am considering Yuma my new hometown (city, actually - and I'm okay with that!). I've always avoided cities, and never ever thought I'd be comfortable living in one, but I really do feel that I could be very happy living here, in Yuma-AZ.

I like the laid-back atmosphere. I like the gentle, swaying palm trees. I like the weather. I like the excitement of starting a new life, in a new place; I like the adventure a new life embraces.

Holland was surprised - but happy too - when I mentioned that to him, at home. He likes Arizona: and I know we'll be spending at least six months here, every year - longer stays are totally doable :-)

We spent big at Wal*Mart: correction - I spent big. But in my defense, it's the holiday season ;-)

We got the groceries went for … and a "few extra's": a perking coffee pot we've been looking for in every Wal*Mart, from coast to coast. A coffee grinder to grind the beans we bought a few weeks ago, that will smell and taste wonderful using that perking coffee pot, tomorrow morning. I also bought 2 skeins of yarn to use for the holiday project I have imagined completed; I'm in the process now of designing it as I work it into being (no, I'm not telling - you will know when it's completed ;-)). And I saw a heated massaging pad and a heated massaging foot bath tub, that I bought on the spur-of-the-moment for Holland; the heated pad will help relax his aching back … and it will also keep him warm into the wee early morning hours, when he's being a night owl; and the heated foot bath will also add comfort. And I grabbed some holiday trims to liven up our living quarters this holiday season - we don't do the santa thing or the tree thing, but pretty lights for my birthday month will go up … and the other holiday trims will be used to trim my current project, underway. On our way home, we stopped and grabbed a chinese supper to eat at home.

We did spend big today.

But it is the holiday season: and the big items that came home with us were reasonably priced, and can be used all year/every year as long as they last.

We spent big this holiday season, but we keep an eye on the bottom line, and aren't seriously hurting money-wise. We can afford to add a little comfort to our lives, at this stage of our lives :-)

A 'holiday' something for Holland.

'East Asian Buffet' Supper; more American than Asian, but still good.

A perking coffee pot that we can use outdoors, too ;-)

Coffee grinder.

Trims for this 2023 holiday season …

Elmo & Patsy - 'Percy the Puny Poinsettia' 1979 song:  (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jisjx9r_mmM)

Seasonal project underway.